Love Me Not - {riren au}

Love Me Not ~ 48

The rift between Eren and Armin that had formed stopped just as soon as it started.

Eren was glad he said something and was able to hear Armin's thoughts. He wanted to know what bothered him and how he was feeling.

He felt bad that Mikasa basically had no idea about any of it. She noticed Armin was more distant with Eren, but didn't question it that much. That surprised Eren. Did she know something that he didn't?

He sat in his room at his desk trying to do homework. Too much was going on in his head for him to concentrate. The calendar in front of him signaling it was October at that point shocked him.

Months had passed, a whole summer went by.

A lot had happened. He realized he was still into someone from his past, and when he thought something might be different, it ended in the blink of an eye.

He didn't want to admit it, but he still thought about Levi. He wondered what he spent his days doing and what he did on his free time besides reading. Levi's kitten crossed his mind as well. Abelle was probably so big it had been so long since he last saw her.

With the positive things he remembered, there was also the negative. The kisses they shared, everything they did haunted him. Those thoughts led to the slender hand holding a cigarette in the passenger seat of his car.

Was it some woman? Was it another young guy he was going to mislead? Did he have a thing for stringing along younger guys?

In the end, it wasn't his place to feel jealousy. He had no say in what Levi did or who he spent his time with. They were never together.

Eren didn't want to trouble anyone else at that point with his drama. It was in the past and a lot more was happening. There was so much still weighing down on him and he decided he'd finally just be honest with Armin and Mikasa about the night he didn't go home. Time didn't help heal it. He thought letting time pass would make it easier to talk about, when in reality it wasn't. It was harder. As time passed and he did start to forget about it he would then be reminded of it again when trying to figure out how to tell his two best friends. Telling them meant speaking about it aloud and he'd be reliving it all in slow motion in his head.

He should've just told Armin that morning. They were alone in the bathroom and he was helping him out covering his hickeys. The other didn't even question him either. Armin really had his back and had many times growing up.

It was a Friday and due to the plans the three had made on Saturday to hang out, they were off from work. He didn't want to tell them randomly while out, so he sent Armin a text and asked if he could come over for the night and sleep over.

Armin instantly felt nervous from Eren's text. The last time he slept over he could barely hide any emotion he felt. He had just realized what he was feeling for the first time. He didn't want to react in a similar way.

There was no way he could say no though. Eren would think it was suspicious and assume he was trying to drift from him. In reality, he actually did want to sleepover.

The small sliver of his brain that he allowed to think about Eren in, "that guy is my crush" type of way was actually excited. They'd probably be cramped into his small bed again and would talk for hours until one of them fell asleep.

That was how it always went in the past. He didn't understand what suddenly changed in his head to make him have feeling for the other and had a whole different view.

Liking Eren had never ever crossed his mind. In the end, he wished that those feelings came sooner. If Armin had realized before Eren connected with Levi again over the summer, they could've been dating.

It could've gone another way though. Eren and Armin could've been dating before he reconnected with Levi, but what would happen when they did first see each other again?

Would that have led to heartbreak as Eren left him for someone else? He knew he was overthinking it and that playing those types of scenarios in his head didn't make any sense.

Was Armin just in his head? Did he like Eren now because he knew he was someone he couldn't have since he was interested in another? What he felt was genuine though, it couldn't be that.

It took another text from Eren saying, "Hey? It says you've been typing for like five minutes now."

Armin looked down and quickly replied, "Sorry. I got distracted. I'll definitely be there. Why were you waiting for my text for so long? Were you just staring at the screen?" He sent back, teasing the other.

"Yeah, I was waiting. See you in a bit." Eren sent back, putting his phone down.

Armin wanted to throw his phone across the room. He was embarrassed, but knew it probably wasn't even a big deal to Eren. He really did get distracted, but it wasn't like he'd actually share what he was distracted about.

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Hi all! Sorry for the late update! I've been having a lot of health issues and am just really going through it rn. :( Thank you to the homies who waited patiently! I'll try and update again ASAP! :)

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