July Chapter 25

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While I was attempting to dry off the best I could, Jay had stormed back to our cabin

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While I was attempting to dry off the best I could, Jay had stormed back to our cabin. Luckily my parents, Uncle Coog and I had moved everything back in earlier that morning while everyone was out and distracted. This meant that when I got back I wouldn't have to worry about pulling dry clothes out of a suitcase or box.

Thank the lord for my attention to detail and neurotic desire to always be efficient and prepared.

Once I was as dry as I was going to get, seeing as I was thrown into the pool fully clothed, I headed back to our cabin myself to get properly dry, to change into dry clothes. But most importantly to confront the cause of all this heartache.

And the cause of my wet clothes.

Was I nervous? Hell yeah but I still went, knowing full well Jay and I were probably going to have an argument. I even knocked on the door so he had a moment to compose himself before I went in.

And so he couldn't say he was blind sided by a sudden appearance.

When I come in, he's standing in the doorway of my room, his hands on his hips, no doubt wondering how all of my stuff got in there in the first place. He turns to me a shakingly dark glare on his face. A look that seems to say: why are you here?

"You... you threw me into the pool," I remind him.

His eyes narrow and it's only after he takes a step towards me, his glare changing into a mask of anger that I realize that maybe that sounded more like an accusation than a reminder.

"You went missing, Rory," he growls. "You disappeared and no one knew where you went. I went looking for you."

Oh. Damn. Really?

"You... you did?"

"Oh, don't look at me like that! Like you're surprised. Of course, I'd go looking for you!" he cries as he turns away from me. "Why did you run Rory? What happened?"

God, I really didn't want to admit that the only reason that Bryce was dating me was because of the Fablehaven permit. I'm humiliate enough about that, I don't really want to have to announce it to everyone on top of that.

"Bryce and I had an argument..."

"No, you didn't. He said you never came back to the Polished Elite." Damn that was true, Bryce didn't see me when I got back. But Jay knowing that means that he talked to Bryce after I ran from Polished Elite. After a pause he deliberate looks me in the eye to whisper: "And that wasn't what I meant."

For minute he and I stare at one another and I realize that he's being vulnerable with me for probably the first time. When I sees that I don't seem to know what he's asking me about he adds: "Why did you run out on me that morning?"

Oh yes, I had done that, hadn't I? "You told me that you slept with me to throw it into Bryce's face."

His eyebrows furrow together. "No I didn't!"

"You did. You said how you couldn't wait to tell Bryce you slept with me first."

"That was just a plus. That is not why I... damn it Rory, that not why I did it."

I cross my arms over my chest and stare him down. "Then fine, why, why did you?"

"Well why did you?"

Why did I sleep with him? Because I was broken and defeated, because I just wanted someone to love me, because the man I thought cared about me had lied to me and wasn't as available as he made himself out to be.

Because I had been in love with Jay since I met him so of course I wanted to have sex with him.

But I couldn't say any of that to him.

"I was drunk, it was birthday sex," I say with a sniff. "And... I've always had that crush on you... so we know I don't find you unappealing."

Jay just stares at me, and I get the feeling that that wasn't the answer he wanted. Though I can't fathom what answer he could have wanted from me. I stare him down waiting for him to answer. I gave him his, the least he could do was answer it back.

After a moment's pause he turned his eyes away from me and growls: "Well I figured, why not? And maybe if I did you might come back and things could go back to the way they were. So... there. Be mad at me over that."

I sigh. It's not the heartfelt answer I wanted either but, I mean, what was I really expecting? It wasn't like he'd just up and decide he loved me if I left. Even if I had rather hoped that would happen.

"I'd rather be mad at you for throwing me into the pool. Couldn't you have just been happy to see me like everyone else was?"

"Of course, I was happy to see you Rory. I hugged you, didn't I?"

That's true, he had.

In front of everyone.

That was a terribly big deal.

But then he had immediately chucked me into the pool.

Kind of conflicting.

I continue to stare at him and groans again, this time it's clear that he's frustrated with me because he sighs heavily again before trying to explain again. "I was just... you went missing. I was worried and then you just walk in here as if you didn't scare the absolute crap out of me. As if you didn't leave me with all the blame for your quitting in the first place?"

"Alright, yes, you're right. You're right, Jay. I'm sorry. I should have responded to your calls or messages I just... I didn't really think you cared alright?"

He's gotten closer to me. His hands are still on his hips but there's only a few inches between me and his broad chest. He's glaring down at me too, so I'm stuck between staring into his beautiful honeyed brown eyes and those lips I still want all over me.

"Well I did. Do. I do. I care."

"Well I didn't know that," I say softly. I search his face, I wonder what he wants, what he'll do, and suddenly he has a hold of me and he's kissed me.

I'm too afraid to throw myself at him and disrupt the spell that has fallen over us. Instead I grip the front of his shirt and let him go about thoroughly kissing me senseless. When he finally pulls away from me, he's a little breathless, but trying to hide it from me so I say nothing about it.

"There, do you know now?" I nod and he lets me go. That vulnerability is gone and he's back to his same stony-faced self. "I have to go back to the pavilion. You've dripped all over our foyer by the way, you better mop that up."

He then storms away from me, slamming the door behind him. I'm left there in the silence of my old cabin blinking my eyes. I'm not sure what just happened or where we stand but I feel like everything, everything in the whole wide world has changed. 

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