Jaan

Part 5-Feeling

Adalina's POV.

Fazal has been ignoring me for a week. He stopped joining Ayla and me for our study sessions.

He doesn't look or talk to us. He completely distanced himself from us. I explained to Ayla what happened and she's also confused.

My point wasn't to make him mad or upset. I was only trying to help. But, I feel like I did something that he didn't really like. It must be deep since he decided not to have anything to do with us anymore.

I also realized that his face is not bruised anymore and he looks good. As if the bullies had stopped bothering him.

As for the video, I stopped Ayla from giving it to her sister's friend. I remember clearly when he said that he would help himself which basically translates to: mind your own business. I thought we were good friends. Close enough to help each other but I guess I was wrong. He doesn't want any help.

I am pretty upset. Mostly because he could've just let us know that he doesn't want to be our friend. Instead, he just stopped caring without saying a word. I don't even know if I should feel guilty or not.

The bullies are kind of different now. Zahara stopped bothering me but I feel like she always keeps an eye on me and that's awkward. She hangs with Ahmed, who I can tell just by the way he looks at her he is definitely into her. Explains why he always has her back and shows support.

Miran is a very odd guy. He's part of them and we've seen him join the fight the first time we saw them beating up Fazal however when he talks to me or Ayla he seems to be the nicest guy. He's very social and unexpectedly funny sometimes.

He likes to randomly come and see us and just have conversations with us. I'm not sure if we should trust him. I don't understand why he's the only one out of his gang who's actually interested in us.

Moving on to Aslan, I just hate him even more. My brain keeps telling me that because of him Fazal definitely stopped talking to us. He must've threatened him or something like that.

And overall, everything that I've seen and heard about him is bad. He says bad words, he beats people up and everyone is always so scared of him.

He still gets his lunch from me. I try not to have eye contact with him at all.

Other than that, I have to do his homework now and give him my exam answers.

Thoughts were running all over in my head but it didn't stop me from cleaning my room. Being in school and having to keep my life balanced at the same time is barely possible. My room always becomes a mess before I even realize it.

I began folding some washed clothes when Abbu walked into my room.

"Hey sweetie," he said.

"Abbu, is everything okay?" I asked him.

"Yes beta, I'm fine I want to ask you if you've made your choice for college?" he asked.

"Oh..."

I haven't even been thinking about it really. It bothers me how everyone around me seems to know what they want to be and study but I'm still clueless.

I mean I'm a great student. I have good grades and I'm always the first in class but I don't really have anything that I like. Or should I say, I don't know what to do for the rest of my life.

"I'm not sure," I hesitated.

"It's okay dear, take your time, oh and Aunty next door wants you to take care of her kids tomorrow " he reminded me.

I nodded with a smile as he left my room.

Sometimes, I really believe that my dad loves me more than Ammi Jaan. He never raised his voice at me. He never beat me up or got mad at me. He's totally soft compared to my mother. Maybe that's where my personality comes from.