XCV: Seven-Spotted Ladybird

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❝If you remember me, then I don't care if everyone else forgets.❞
—Haruki Murakami

Alexander titled this poem Bozh'ia Korovka. I read it to myself. I love it.

Ladybirds, ever divine,
need only flowers to exist.
And longing hearts
need only ladybirds.

If the world were to fall,
ladybirds have flowers.
If the world were to fall,
longing hearts have ladybirds.

Where are the flowers?
Where are the ladybirds?
Where are you?
Come back.

"What are they sayin'?"

John turns up the radio, waking me up from my minor daze of awe the wide, snowy flatlands left me in. I lean away from the window, my forehead cold from pressing against the frozen glass, and listen to the report being made.

I frown, and when the report finishes, I summarize for John.

"China is still bombing Japan, and not a single Japanese plane can even get near China. After the Japanese submarine sank one of the Filipino vessels yesterday, the Filipino president has been talking to Nikolai Ivanovich to formally join on the side of the Voynas."

John grimaces. "With China to the West, the Philippines to the South, and Vietnam close by, Japan is absolutely fucked."

"Maybe," I pout. "Japan's Navy is one of the strongest-"

"What else was said?"

I bite my lip. "Well, the AC has been driven all the way out of Ukraine and back to the Poland border. They tried to initiate a rear attack on the soldiers there fighting the Germans. It didn't work. They went around to rejoin the Germans."

"Ukraine is lost," John says. "There's no hope in gettin' it back."

"Ukraine is the reason why-"

"Was that it?"

I piece back the Ukrainian words in my memory, form them into Russian sentences, then speak them in English dialect.

"With Ukraine secure, Nikolai Ivanovich is building up his forces for a full invasion of Belarus. With the insufficient military of Belarus, it's likely to go down very easily unless any of the Allied countries send in more troops."

"That's unlikely... Huh, Belarus was the only ally we had from all the former Soviet countries, and now it's goin' to get fucked."

"Russian troops are deployed in many locations. That might weaken..." I trail off, realizing my forced optimism isn't helping John. I clear my throat and continue my reporting. "Ukraine is secured. Belarus is in danger. The way is being paved for the USSR to reunite... But no nukes have been dropped yet. Those are the relevant points, John."

Why try to act like it's okay? It won't change the fact that my actions directly caused all of this.

June 23, 2063.

It's been five days since the lock on the gates to hell has been removed. The world is waiting for the Devil to kick the door open and set the Earth on fire.

That's five days with John. Five days of his obvious resentment. Five days of biding my time. Five days of deliberating whether this is euphoria or torture.

Considering the current state of the war, I suppose it's a good thing that John and I will officially be out of Ukraine by tomorrow. Out of Ukraine and in Belarus... This is the detour we had to take, and while it's a risky move, we have a plan to slip into the country without being caught.

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