"That was weird, but I can't stop my heart beating ten times faster than it should be. Laying down on the bed I face away from the bathroom door not wanting him to look at me. I pull the white cover up to my nose and look at the wall. I hear the bat...
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It's barely been 30 minutes and I am ready to go home. This class just makes me want to sleep, especially since our teacher Mr. Greene is just a small old man, his voice can really lull you to sleep. History class can be a real bore. You know? Even though Alison is in this class, it still doesn't catch my attention.
The only thing that is keeping me up is the thought of why Mateo was looking our way. Okay maybe I'm over exaggerating, but there is just something that seemed off. I have never in my four years of high school talked to Mateo. It's not that I have something against him but I just never had the need to make new friends since I have Alison.
I shake the thought out of my head and focus on Mr. Greene. It's nothing new we're learning, since it's barely the first day of classes most teachers don't pass out assignments, so technically that's kind of good. The only reason Alison is so quiet is because she's too busy giving Alejandro googly eyes.
After class, Alison and I say our goodbye's to each other since we don't have the next class together. I walk into English and smile at Ms. Garcia. Now this class is more my speed, I love to read. Any other class I don't really care for, but I still keep my grades up. I take my seat at the back of the room since I don't like sitting at the front or the middle.
Once the tardy bell rings, everyone is already situated in their seats. Nobody sits next to me and I am not upset about it. Here's the thing, I don't mind sitting next to someone but the thought of having to talk to someone when working on an assignment or something else does not sit right with me.
"Welcome Back Seniors! I am happy to be your teacher this year and I hope you all ar-"
Everyone turns to look at the door that has just been opened and the one and only Mateo walks in.
"Sorry Ms. Garcia, I was using the restroom," Mateo says with a warm smile. A very attractive one too. "It's fine Mateo. Go ahead and have a seat," she waves her hand in the direction where we're seated.
After that, I see Mateo looking around the classroom trying to find a seat. That's when he looks in my direction. I don't know what to do! Do I smile, do I look mad, do I make a bitch face that way he doesn't come and sit next to me. While doing all my thinking I don't realize he's starting to walk in my direction. Uh oh, where's Alison when I need her. I decided it's best if I just look down at my hands.
I hear the chair being pulled out next to me, and I get nervous. I don't know why I'm getting nervous. He's just sitting next to me, it's not a big deal. Why couldn't Alison and I have all of the same classes, it would've been fine if she just kept telling me about Alejandro, I don't mind.
"Okay, since it's only the first day we will be doing something simple," Ms. Garcia says to the class. I wonder what she's going to make us do.
"With the person you're sitting next to, discuss what you will be doing after high school. Whether it's going to college or following your dreams. Okay you have 15 minutes." Ms. Garcia finishes telling the class what to do and she sits at her desk.
I start freaking out on the inside. I mean what am I supposed to say , I don't even want to grow up and leave the house. Oh gosh. This is the worst way to get to know my fellow classmates.
"So ummm. My name is Mateo," Mateo says in a friendly tone. I look to my left and I just freeze. What am I going to do, I mean yes it's just telling him my name but I'm already having a personal crisis I can't have another.
"Uh, I'm Veronica," I try to say in the politest tone I have. Mateo just gives me a nice smile and I don't know what else to say.
"So what are your plans once we graduate," he says not knowing I'm panicking on the inside.
"Uhhh I have to use the restroom. Ms. Garcia can I have a hall pass to go use the restroom." I say raising my hand and trying to calm down at the same time.
"Come up here and get it please," the teacher says and by the time she has finished her sentence I have already gotten the hall pass and left the class.
I don't even know where I'm going, all I know is that I needed to leave that classroom. Just the thought of entering adulthood and having to be on my own freaks me out. Nobody really knows about my fear, except for Alison. Christopher doesn't even know, but that's understandable since we don't really talk to each other any more. I sometimes think that maybe if we didn't become distant with each other I wouldn't have this fear.
I really looked up to Chris when I was younger. I wanted to be like him, so caring, and independent. But it all changed the summer going into freshman year.
I'm taken out of my thoughts by a tap on my shoulder. I turn around and see Mateo looking down at me. I then looked around me and realized that I just stopped mid hallway. Great. Now Mateo thinks I'm weird since I'm just standing here zoning out.
"Ms. Garcia sent me to see if you were alright. You kind of just left looking panicked. Are you okay?" I look up at him and it seems like all the thoughts about Christopher just leave my mind. There is just something about Mateo that makes my mind clear. "Oh uh yeah, sorry I just had to use the restroom. You know first day nerves haha," I try my best to keep it casual but I'm just embarrassing myself.
"Oh ok, we should go back to class now," he says as he turns around to start walking to class.
"Actually I can't go back there, you go ahead," I smile at him politely but I don't give him a chance to respond as I turn around and turn to another hallway.
Oh gosh. What a great start to senior year. Yay me.
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