Bonded To You (Drarry)

13 Weeks

Harry had frantically looked through the morning sickness sections of all the male pregnancy books he had bought and, still, found no explanation for why Draco was still having it. Every single book had said the same thing: Wizards usually cease to feel nauseous or have morning sickness after the first trimester ends.

Why is it happening, then?

The two hadn't had any pregnancy-related conversations for two weeks, ever since Harry had tried to talk the blonde into sticking around after the birth and effectively pissed him off. In his defense, he hadn't even planned on saying anything. It had all just...come out.

At first, the brunette had promised himself not to bring up what Malfoy had said. He wasn't even sure whether the blonde had meant what he said or not. It might've just been the bond causing Draco to say things he didn't really mean, after all.

The more the brunette thought about it, though, the more convinced he became that all of the blonde's words were true. After all, the bond never made Harry feel anything he didn't originally feel. It just...made him more honest, and amplified his emotions a bit, pushing him towards Draco and making it hard for him to hate the blonde. Even under the effects of the bond, the brunette felt nothing romantic towards Draco, because he didn't have such feelings before the two of them were bonded.

If my feelings weren't changed by the bond...

Then, Draco's wouldn't be, either.

Suddenly, every single memory of the blonde off the potions raced back to Harry and the brunette realized two things: 1) Draco had feelings for him, and 2) the blonde didn't want to give up the babies, but thinks he has to. Almost instantly, Harry's mind painted a perfect picture of them together, their twins playing around them, as they sat at the breakfast table discussing whatever married individuals talked about. It was a perfect fantasy, but nothing more; it could never come true.

The brunette would be lying if he said he didn't feel the same way about Draco, but that was different. It didn't count. Draco was under the bond's influence at the time. Even if the bond didn't change his feelings, it did change how he acted around Harry; it made Draco more honest, vulnerable, relatable, and, ultimately, likeable. Without the bond, the blonde would never have shared his feelings with Harry and, thus, the brunette would never have felt anything towards Draco. In a way, the brunette had feelings for a person who didn't really exist, or was always hidden behind Malfoy's pride and cold exterior.

But thinking about the bond and its effects was exhausting. The brunette willed himself to stop, but there was still something important he needed to address.

Should I talk to him about the babies?

Is it really my place?

For a brief window of time the brunette was wholly convinced by the blonde's argument and decided he wouldn't try to get Draco to stay. Draco was right; there were many people who wanted revenge against death eaters, to the point where they would kidnap and kill their children. But, deep down, he also felt guilty, as if he was somehow failing both Draco and their children by not convincing the blonde to stay. Sure, Draco thought that it was best for him not to be involved, but would the twins feel the same way, not having their father around? What would Harry say to them if they ask him about their other father? "Oh, he thought his reputation would ruin your lives and I didn't disagree." No. He wouldn't say that. He wouldn't be able to give them any explanation. He wouldn't even be able to face them.

The brunette thought about his own childhood, how it felt not to have his parents around, not to know anything about them except for the fact that they weren't there. It was a horrible experience, one that he never wanted his own children to go through. Yet, here he was, making a decision that would result in exactly that. They would want Draco around, Harry was sure of that. And Draco wanted them, too, more than anything. The brunette had felt his yearning, his anguish at the thought of leaving his own children behind, his connection with the babies growing inside of him...Draco loved them with all his heart, so much that he would give them up to make their lives better, that he would put their needs ahead of his...It meant he would do anything for them and that he would make a good father, regardless of the circumstances. Harry needed to talk to the blonde.

Of course, that was easier said than done. Any time Harry brought up the topic within the past two weeks, the blonde responded by silently getting up and leaving the room. The blonde was stubborn and clearly determined not to take any risks, so they couldn't possibly stay in the wizarding world.

I just don't get what why he said no to the muggle world as well.

I can't believe you're still thinking about this.

I said no, Potter.

Let it go.

Harry looked up to find that the blonde was seated across from him, already digging into the lunch that Harry had made.

"Why didn't you tell me you were still sick? It's not normal for you to be throwing up at this stage," he murmured, looking Draco in the eye.

"It's not like I needed you to hold my hair back for me," the blonde said slowly, a confused expression on his face, "Besides, I already owled Granger. She says it isn't that uncommon for people to have morning sickness well into their second trimester."

Harry felt like he had been slapped.

"You called Hermione? Why didn't you come to me?" he asked, the irritation clear in his tone.

"And when did you graduate healer school?" the blonde asked sarcastically, smiling a bit. The brunette didn't smile back.

That's not funny, Malfoy!

You said you'd keep me updated...

About this?

How would it benefit you to know this tiny little detail?!

"There are potions you can take for that, so you'd be more comfortable," Harry said, rolling his eyes, "I could've gotten them for you!"

"I know. I'm already taking them," the blonde responded casually. That only made the brunette more angry. Why didn't he know about any of this?

"And you didn't tell me?!" he snapped.

"The last time I told you about a potion, you freaked out and made the situation very unpleasant for me. Excuse me for not wanting you to do that again," the blonde defended, "Besides, I didn't know you cared that much."

"Of course, I do," Harry gritted out, crossed his arms in front of his chest in a defensive gesture.

"This isn't for the baby. This is for me, for my comfort," Draco said, then took a bite of his chicken, "It doesn't concern you."

"Yes, I know. Maybe I care about your well-being, too."

Neither of them spoke after that. Harry went back to his own breakfast, which he quickly shoveled into his mouth seeing as how he was already late for a meeting. He didn't notice how the blonde, now blushing, was looking at him lovingly, a certain longing in his eyes.