Kirishima x Depressed and Drug using Reader(fem)

22....Reunited

(A/n: posting early cuz Im really excited about this chapter...i really like it. So enjoy!)

[Your pov]

       “Why didn't you just ask for help!?” another voice almost yelled. And that made you snap. Your eyes welled with tears and threatened to fall. Your chest filled with an all to familiar feeling of discomfort and sickness. You felt like you were going to vomit. Like you were overheating and were going to sweat to death. You could feel your skin get hot, and the way the cool air of the hospital room made contact with your skin sent shivers down your spine.

The talking continued, and they gradually started getting closer, and Kirishima was telling them to back off. It was as if there was a debate about you going on right in front of you and you couldn't contribute at all.

    “Y/n we’re your friends,” Tsu said.

“Why didn't you come to us if you were struggling?” So much was happening and you had no idea how to handle it. And the emotions you were feeling were just as overwhelming and similar to the ones you felt when you and Jin almost got caught at the store.

    “BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW HOW!!!” you yelled. And just like that your body began to shake and your breath became deep, short and ragged.  The room became silent and you could feel the atmosphere change. 

    “I didn't ask because I didn't know how…” you say, looking at your knees. You hands were clenched so hard that your knuckles turned white.

“W-what do you mean Y/n? You know we’re here for you…” Ojiro said with an almost self pitying tone. 

    “No. I don't. You don't understand how hard it was to keep a smile on my face. How hard it was to not fall apart every time the smallest inconvenience in my life would affect how I felt in my dorm room, just sitting and overthinking all alone.” you spat with venom. But this time it was different. Not how you did before. It wasn't as aggressive. This sounded more saddened, more desperate, “The endless panic and anxiety attacks! How hard it was for me to try and stay sane!”

    “All you needed to do was approach us and we would have done our best to support you in any way we could!” Iida said.

    “What part of ‘I didn't know how’ do you not understand Iida!?” you let out a gruff breath of frustration. 

    “I didn't know how to ask. And even now I still don't want help!” you let out a laugh, “Shit, I'm so weak right now that I can barely find enough energy to move around on my own! I physically and mentally can't handle any of this. And yet here I am! In a fucking hospital out of all the place I could have ended up!”

    Your breath picked up and became more sharp and broken. The panic was beginning to set in. you put your hands over your face and ran them up into your hair, “Do you guys even understand how much trouble I’m in? How many laws that I’ve broken!? How literally my entire life has just been me living a double life?” you gasp.

    “Y/n...Your not al-” Momo started.

“Alone? I'm not alone?” you interrupted with a scoff, “I didn't know that! I was never a part of any of your friend groups! How stupid does a person have to be to finally realize how little they know about a person? None of you can even begin to process how the fuck I felt! How lost I felt!” you heard your voice crack, and tried not to cringe at how pathetic you must sound.

        “That's not true! You were always with us…..” Sero said. But his face soon turned into one of worry.  “Right…?” 

    And there it was. The realization started to flood into the room. You looked up and saw how their faces changed. Even Bakugou’s expression faltered.