Fifty-two. Free time

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Y/N pov

"Are you gonna tell the rest? Now that she knows?" Nat asks just as i sit down in the kitchen. I'm too tired to even ask her how she knows i told her.

"Good Morning to you too, and no, we don't want anyone to know just yet. Beside it might not even work"

"Still, i suspect that she'll carry it since your dead and all"

"Yes, she is"

"How are gonna revert your cells then, i mean since you're technically not alive therefore not fertile"

"Is this really how we're gonna spend our breakfast? Can't we talk about it in training later?"

"We will, just answer the question"

"I know where to get a sample from before i turned"

"How? Where?"

"There were something special about mine and Bucks cells, something about us being twins. But they needed it so they stored some from him as well. Good if you want to have super twins or triplets raised in Hydra"

"How do you know they haven't used it?"

"Because it hid it, in my cell under the floor. It should be delivered here this afternoon" before she can ask anything else i say. "Now let's just eat and not talk about it"

"Talk about what?" Bruce says, entering the room.

"Fertility shit" i give her a look, even though Bruce already knows. He asked to not be involved, he's happy for us but doesn't want to be to involved too close.

"Natasha, might not be the subject for breakfast" i give him a thankful gaze.

"Fine, i'll see you down there" she says and leaves.

"Is everything alright between you two?" I ask, taking a sip of my coffee.

"I prefer not to talk about it"

"I know, i just thought if i know your side of the story i might be able to help"

"I appreciate that but its fine"

"Alrighty, you know where to find me if you wanna talk" i say and he humm in response before i walk back to my bedroom.

"You know the whole thing about sharing a bed is that we're supposed to wake up together" Wanda mumbles when she hears me open the door.

"I know an i'm sorry, I couldn't sleep" i answer, leaning over her on the bed to reach her lips.

"Can you at least stay so that i can wake up again?" she asks, making me laugh.

"Sorry i promised to train with Tasha"

"Who?" I forgot I'm the only one to call her that. And she's too tired to think.

"Nat" and she hums an answer as i put on my favorite workout clothes. "I'll see you at breakfast laster then, i love you"

"Yeah yeah, love you" she mumbles fake angry that i can't stay. She had trained with Nat yesterday so she's exhausted. She deserves to sleep so i let her. Leaving her with another kiss on her shoulder and going down to Nat in the gym. I'm trying to keep myself as occupied as possible, to not think about the fact that I'm going to leave her. One of the many reasons i can't sleep.

"Ready?" Nat asks, throwing me a bo staff.

"Sure, are you ready to talk about you and Bruce?"

"Absolutely not" and i start doing easy fall outs and attacks.

"So talking about mine is okay but not your own?"

"Right"

"You know that isn't healthy right?"

"You of all people should understand why, you've lived lifes like mine, where your forced to push everything into little boxes and put those boxes away"

"I know, I know. But still, if you force me to open those boxes, you have to do it too" she too focused on my words that i sweep the staff under her legs, making her fall back. "It's something, since you can't focus on me"

"I let you win"

"Sure" i give her a smile before suggesting. "How about a walk"

She agrees and we walk out into the streets. She's quiet so i have to make the first move in the conversation. About ten minutes later into the walk i decide to start as we're about to enter central park.

"I didn't think i deserved happiness either, not after everything i've done"

"That's different"

"How? We're more similar than you think. Were both murdurus, assassins"

"I was raised to kill, you had a normal childhood"

"My parents died when i was ten and since i was the oldest i had to take care of my four younger siblings. One of my sisters left, then Bucky enlisted in the army and got captured by Hydra. I followed Steve around on his tour and had to leave my family behind" i snap then take a breath before continuing. "Then i found love and married him, then i had to go get my brother back again, and i died at the age of 28 and when i got back i had found out that both Steve my husband where dead, i would say my childhood was nothing but normal"

She looks stunned by the things i shared. But that's my life story, whether i like it or not. I've been through many shares of pain in my life.

"Remind me to never complain about life around you" she laughs it off even though i can see it's in her mind. But i also laugh it off as we sitt down in the middle of the park, by the lake.

"But it does go away" she looks back at me. "the pain, and the scars fade"

"Easy for you to say, your immortal"

"But i can still be killed" i look back out the lake, seeing some swans out on the water.

"What do you mean? With a wooden stick?" she laughs.

"No it's more complicated than that but i can still die, or at least stop existing"

"How?" I look questiongly at her. "Sorry i didn't mean to pray, but you've been more 'human' acting since the bunker. Did something happen?"

"What do you mean more 'human'?"

"Like wanting a child when you didn't from the beginning, moving the wedding to in a few days. You seem to forget that you can't hide anything from me"

"I would tell you but then you would probably tell someone else and Wanda would know in the end."

"I would not" she say dramatically offended.

"Also she can see in your mind"

"You can make her not" i meet her dead serious gaze. "I'm serious, maybe i can help"

"You can't but i appreciate that you think that"

"Then what difference does it make that i know or not"

"I thought we went on this to talk about you?"

"Well now we have your boxes on the table and not mine, so spill"

"I can't Nat, i would if i could, but it's not something someone like you can fix"

"Someone like me? Assassin? Murderer?"

"Human" the answer shocks her but i just look back out the lake. Listening to all the people going on there life, some police sirens and some alarms from different places. Somewhat peaceful, even though its loud and not that warm outside. It's home, it's my home. To myself you mumble the words that i think Nat won't hear. "Im gonna miss it here"

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