Chapter 23 - North

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I sat back into my chair, feeling slightly sleepy after my lunch. Luke had insisted on 'escorting' me to lunch today, as he hadn't had 'a turn' yet. We had gone to the same cafe as yesterday. I'd looked around nervously upon entering, relieved to see the waiter from yesterday wasn't working today. I had been happy with a small salad but Luke had bought several desserts, trying to convert me over to the 'dark side'. Insisting on me eating mouthfuls and then asking my opinion of them. It was the most relaxed lunch I had had since working here, but I felt deliciously full and now was struggling to keep my eyes open. Not much sleep the night before followed by a relaxing lunch was not a good mix.

Picking up a list of accounts, I began to organize the monthly statements to be sent out. Reaching for the stapler, something low on the side of my desk caught my eye. I froze, already feeling sick in my stomach. Turning my head as slowly as possible I saw the biggest spider I had ever seen. It was easily as big as my hand, it's bulbous body and thick hairy legs were terrifying.

I started shaking, my breath caught. I clutched the stapler and threw it at it. It missed the spider, hitting the desk just behind it. The thwunk it made as it hit my desk startled me, and caused the spider to dart closer to me. I backed up, pushing my chair against the wall, trying to get as far away as possible. It's eyes were fixed on me, creeping slowly closer. Dizziness started rushing over me, I drew in a shallow breath and could hear myself panting. I stood up on my chair, pressing myself against the wall, my eyes fixated on it.

'What the h*ll are you doing?'

A loud shout and heavy footsteps sent the spider scuttling closer. A whimper escaped me. I pushed my face against the wall, trying to shut it out. My heartbeat thudded loudly in my ears, drowning out everything. It is one spider, no one is watching. It wasn't him. It couldn't be. I squeezed my eyes shut. It couldn't be, I didn't want this.

'Hey' the voice returned, softer. I tried to focus on the low gravelly voice. Peeking my eyes open big black boots entered my vision, followed by black jeans. I slowly raised my gaze to take in the black fitted t-shirt, shoulder holster and thick stubble framing a fierce face. A small scar ran down the side of his face starting just above his eyebrow to below his cheekbone. He naturally emitted menace. I looked back down at his boots. Solid black boots, perfect for killing spiders. My eyes returned to the spider, with every small step he took nearer; the closer the spider came towards me. I shifted backwards again, leaning my weight back and felt my chair start to slide away from underneath me.

I leapt at him, his arms supporting me. My legs encircled his waist and my arms shot around his neck. I buried my face into his shoulder pleading, 'Kill it, just kill it. Step on it, shoot it, do something and kill it.'

I held on tight and felt him shift his feet. Slowly walking towards the spider. My arms and legs tightened reflexively, my body shaking.

'F*ck.'

His right arm moved away from his body, causing me to try and pull myself even closer to him. His boot slammed into the ground with a slight twist.

His arm returned to around me, his hand lightly stroking the back of my head. 'It's gone.' His voice rumbling close to my ear, centering me. I breathed in his musk scent, luxuriating in it.

I nodded my head, keeping my eyes closed, trying to regulate my breathing to be able to talk. I didn't want to move. I felt safe in his arms. He was scary enough to keep anyone away. He had slain the spider with one swift assault. He was my hero and I was never letting him go.

A door opened down the hallway and the scuffing of multiple footsteps came closer. His arms remained firm around me, unfaltering.

There was a sudden silence as the footsteps stopped. A throat cleared before the silence stretched.

I kept my eyes closed. I was not moving.

'I see you've met North.' The amusement was clear in Luke's voice.

'Seems like you two are getting along nicely. Should we give you two a moment?' Nathan added.

My reality crashed back to me. This was North. I was at work and had a meltdown over a monster spider. My legs were wrapped around his waist with my skirt barely covering my upper thighs. My face was still firmly buried against his neck, the stubble on his jaw lightly scratching my cheek.

I pulled back and gazed at North's face. It was granite, his dark eyes slowly moving over my face. His arms still firm around me, holding me secure. 'Thank you,' I whispered, 'Sorry and thank you, thank you, thank you.' I wrapped my arms around him again and hugged him with all my might. My first hug.

'I don't know how you did it, or what you did, but I'm doing it tomorrow.' Silas commented wryly.

There was a grunt of agreement.

I slowly pried my arms and legs off North. He carefully lowered me to the ground. Ducking my head down I quickly straightened myself, pulling my skirt down and brushing a few stray strands of hair that had escaped my bun back. I turned to see our audience.

Luke, Silas, Nathan and Kota stood there, their faces expressionless.

I started stuttering, 'There was a...' my hand gestured uselessly at the desk, unwilling to think about it, my sentence trailing off. I felt nausea rush over me again and I started shaking my head vehemently.

My right hand landed on my left arm, rubbing up and down fervently.

'I...ah... I... there...' My breath caught and I froze, staring fixedly at a spot on my desk. A shudder ran through me.

Large calloused hands closed around my upper arms, pulling me gently back into an embrace. I turned into him and rested my forehead against his firm chest.

North's low murmur filtered through 'Breathe in...Breathe out. One. Breathe in... Breathe out. Two.'

I listened closely, following his words. I managed a belated three before breathing in deeply. I slowly calmed, feeling my heartbeat recede from my hearing. I concentrated on the slow movement of his hand, stroking my back.

'Don't think about it. It's a trigger. What's your full name? Say it slowly.'

Names rushed at me, the names I had taken and discarded, all comprising pieces of my identity. My mind was blank. 'I don't know.' I slowly answered.

'Humph... Tell me your favourite colour.'

This was easy, the little girl in me that had been denied all my life had cemented pink as my colour for life. 'P-pink.'

His voice was laced with amusement 'Of course it is. Favourite drink?'

I hadn't had the luxury to enjoy a variety of drinks. It was water or a cup of tea. 'Tea?'

His arms loosened, guiding me around 'Let's go get you a cup of tea then.'

We walked to the tearoom with our audience following.

North directed me to the couch, giving my shoulder a light squeeze before filling up the kettle and turning it on.

I stared woodenly at the table, trying to snap out of the fog surrounding me but feeling it closing in again. My hand returning to my arm, rubbing up and down firmly.

Silas slowly approached, sitting beside me before carefully pulling me into his lap. I sat frozen for a moment. This was Silas. He always hugged me. I turned and threw my arms around him, hugging him close. I breathed in his ocean scent, enjoying the security I felt in his arms.

The low murmur of voices around us comforted me, grounded me. I think I felt at home. I never wanted to leave.

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