Guardian Blue - Season 1

Episode 23 - Losing

Judy woke up in another oversized hospital bed.  She was not alone.  Chief Bogo was in the room.  Somehow waking up to him wasn’t comforting, and the reasons all came rushing in at once.  Flashes of what happened after flooded in too.  Judy took the little girl wolf out of the dangerous location to reunite her with her mom who was almost explosively grateful.  But Judy didn’t have time to soak up the praise.  She had to get help.  She borrowed the wolf lady’s cell and called Clawhauser directly.  She knew she was barely intelligible, but she gave Clawhauser the location.  Help would come, the cheetah promised.

Judy didn’t even ask how the elephant thing was going.  She just hugged her knees to her chest and everyone watched her as she shook, fighting crying yet again.  When help arrived she took them hastily down to where it had happened.  Flashlights provided light but little else.  There was no fox to be seen, clinging on debris, fighting the rushing current so far below.  No answer came to multiple calls.  Wolf noses would be no help and there wasn’t even a way to get down to him if the fall were not almost certainly fatal.  They couldn’t help him.  Judy grabbed a rope from the rescue team’s duffel and fought efforts to restrain her on the narrow walkway.  She remembered fighting.  She was desperate.  They had to do something.  It was his only chance.  She heard a ‘pif’ from an air cartridge.  A tranq gun.  She had turned to see Wolfard holding it.  He tranquilized her.  She was so out of control that he had to tranquilize her.  She remembered his sad face. 

“Hopps…”  Bogo’s voice did not carry a happy tone to it.

“Nick…”  Judy half whispered.  Her throat hurt.  She had been screaming after he fell.  She remembered.

“We haven’t found him.  We found the attacker, he was washed out into the river.”  Judy perked up a bit, her mind beginning to pull away from the sedation.

She asked softly, “Was he alive?”  If Darmaw had survived, maybe Nick had a chance.

“No, he did not survive.  We do not have the autopsy yet but drowning was suspected.  You were the only other mammal on scene so we don’t even know the full details of what happened in the first place.  There’s not a rush for that Judy.  This is… a lot.”  Bogo hung his head.

Judy’s body ached, her heart felt like it was missing and her stomach felt like it wanted to empty.  She whispers softly.  “Then he’s gone…”  She began to shake a little.  Wake up.  It was a nightmare.  It was a dream; it had to be a dream.  Something this terrible could not be real.  Not with all the good she’d done.  It couldn’t be allowed.  Not this. 

Bogo’s voice deepened and became softer.  “I’m sorry Judy.  Even if he survived the fall, the water’s just above freezing.  We’re… treating this as a recovery, not a rescue at this point.”  Judy’s heart raced and her body felt clammy.  Nick was dead and she had killed someone.  She killed Darmaw and couldn’t save her partner.  Both of those things were unthinkable realities of her job and she wasn’t ready for both at once.

Judy sat up suddenly and whimpered.  “Trash can.”  Bogo provided it to her so she could be sick with as much dignity as that would allow.  Once that was over, she just sobbed, her voice amplified a bit by the plastic bin.  Bogo remained there for a bit longer, waiting for Judy to recover a bit.  She put the bin down by the bed fearing she may need it again as she laid back, head on the far-too-large pillow. 

Bogo spoke again, his voice a little louder.  “I wanted you to know, even with this tragedy, you and Nick saved an uncountable number of civilians and officers today.  Your partner and the shooter were the only known fatalities.  Three officers were injured in the process of getting the two elephants contained but it could have been so much worse.  There were 13 more pellets in Darmaw’s rifle.”  Judy felt rage build up in her.  Nick was the only one who lost his life and he was the one who figured out the plot.  He was the one who saved the little girl.  He didn’t deserve to die.  He deserved it least of anyone.  Judy took a breath, recalling her training.  She wasn’t supposed to fall into the what-if pit.  She couldn’t allow herself to second guess what she did, she did her best.  Nick did his best.  But she was the only one who survived.  What was she supposed to do now?  How was she supposed to deal with this?  How could she?  She couldn’t imagine life without him.