Dragon Wars: Flames Of Pain (Book 3)

Chapter 42 (Josephs POV) Meet Them v2

I stared at the food that sat on the table for me, as I knew that I needed to eat it for sure, as I had not ate in quite a bit of some time. I just did not feel all that hungry for some odd reason or another how ever, as I moved the spoon that I had in my hand, just a little bit, as I let out a quite loud sigh at the exact same time too.
I saw my father staring at me from the other side of the table, but I did my best to ignore him, as I really did not want to hear about how he felt bad for me, or about how he really regrets all that he did to me and my sister in the past. The real person that he needed to apologize to, was my mother, but sadly that was not possible, as she was no longer here with us.
I had so many thoughts of what could have been. I was not sure as to why she had never told any of us, much less our father about all of the dragons, and all that came with it to. Perhaps she was trying to hide it from us, in the hopes that we might live some kind of normal life in the end.
I blinked a few times, as I felt like, just based off of the dreams that I had with the dragons in it, that surely, she should have seen this coming right? I was just so lost, as I had so many questions, but sadly, there was just no one there to answer them for me, as it was like John had once said to me, 'no one will ever know what you go through'.
It kind of amused me at the same time too how ever, as to the fact that they thought that these dreams were some sort of privilege for me to have, and that I was lucky to have dreams were a massive dragon talked to me every night, and threatened just about every person that I ever cared about, and always brought up the fact that he killed my mother and my uncle.
I hated it, as it was more like a horror story to me at this point. I wish that I could give my powers to some one else, so that they would know the pain, and the fear that I had on the daily basis, as well as the fact that I always knew that when I was to go to sleep, they would be back in my dreams.
I let out a bit of a soft sigh at the same time too, as I moved the bowl a fair bit back from me, as I really did not feel like I wanted to eat it, at this very moment at all. I was hungry, and I could very much feel my stomach rumbling, telling me that I needed to get at least some sort of food before I started off my day.
I knew that today was going to be quite a hard day as well, bringing more to come in the future. It was not the fact that it was going to be a hard day that really bothered me, as the part that felt like it bothered me the most, was the fact that not only was I about to talk to a whole bunch of people that I did not know at all, but I also was going to have to lead these people.
It was also the fact that I was not going to be a normal leader either. It was the fact that I had a lot of stress at the same time too, that I was going to have to be the guy that was going to save the world. That scared me quite a bit to think about, as I was for sure, very much an introvert as well.
I shook my head, as I did my best to just shake all of those thoughts from out of my head at the exact same time too, as I then closed my eyes. I really needed some thing to clear my mind, and the fact that Julia had not been there for me last night, had hurt me quite a bit, as I wanted to express how I felt at the moment to some one.
I knew that John had told me that he was always there for me, but I felt like I did not get the emotion, nor any sort of expression from him, like I did when I spoke on things like that to Julia. Also the fact, that I was in love with Julia, and John was simply just the guy that was training me in a legion that was getting ready to go to war to a fairly imminent death against dragons.
Some thing was not working in any of this at all clearly, as I was still a bit lost in some sort of strange thoughts, as I wanted to just slam my head on the table, like I was some sort of maniac. I did my best to hold in all of my anger, and to control my self from not getting too freaked out at the exact same time as well.
There had been only a few cases as to where I had acted out that way, and this was one of those instances as to where it felt like I really was being tested. And yes, I did know that it was all in my head, but it felt like, that I needed to find some one, or some thing to blame about all that had happened, and what was happening to me right now.
It all came back to the fact that Julia had not been there for me last night. Why had that been the case? I really had a lot of hope that she would have been there, but sadly that had not been the case at all. At the same time as well, another thing came back to me, as I then remembered that her ex boyfriend had spoken up to the whole legion about me just yesterday.
I knew that he had made quite the fool of him self, as no one was going against me at all on that. I was just more on the thought that, perhaps, Julia might be with that guy, at this very moment. She might have known all along that he had been there. Those were the type of thoughts that scared me quite a bit, as I really did not want to lose her.
She really did mean the world to me, as she was the only woman that I had ever fallen in love with for one thing, as well as the fact that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. Well, I wanted to be with her for the rest of my life, after we got rid of the problem as to where we were still worried about all of the dragons.
I did remember what it was that John had said to me at the exact same time too, as it was a bit relaxing to hear him say these exact words "Why would she want to be with some loser like him? You are a great guy Joseph... You just worry too much..." I knew that he was right, but at the exact same time too, I really just could not help it.
I was not so sure as to what was real, and what was fake any more. I felt like I should be ready for just about any thing at this point, as I knew that I could not let any thing surprise me. I let out quite the loud sigh at the exact same time too, which was quite a bit loud, as to the fact that I knew that my father had heard it for sure, and perhaps John might have heard it from the front porch.
I opened my eyes finally, as I was not sure how long I had them closed for in the very first place. At the very least, I had to assume, that I had not had them closed for all too long, as my father was staring at me from the other side of the table, and it did not look like he had taken a single bite of his oatmeal.
I tilted my head, as I was a little bit lost on why he was the one that should be acting like I would be at this very moment, as I blinked my eyes at him, to let him know that I was quite a bit lost on what it was that was going on with him at this very moment, at the exact same time as well.
My father nodded to me, as I was still a bit lost, but I nodded back to him at the exact same time as well, as I was quite a bit hungry for answers, rather than I was hungry for my food for some odd reason or another. It did not take all that long for him to begin to speak after doing so, as I then listened as to what it was that he had to say to me in the very first place too.
"You need to eat son... We've got a long day ahead of us, and John is waiting for us on the front porch..." He said to me, as he nodded towards the bowl of food that was below my head, on the table. I stared at him for just a few moments, with quite the blank look on my face, I was fairly certain of, as I then looked down at the bowl of oatmeal that was beneath me.
I wanted to eat it so badly, as it was one of my favorite flavors, which was of course apple cinnamon, but for some reason, though I knew I was hungry, it seemed like my brain did not want to let me bite in to it. I shook my head at the same time too, as I also knew as to what my father had just said to me, was in fact true.
I had to get some food in to my system, as just like John had been telling me for quite a bit of some time, once all of this was to get started, it was only going to get hard. Which of course, like I had said to my self earlier, did not bother me. I knew that I was not going to make it through the day, if I did not have any food or water how ever.
I looked at the cup of water that was also sitting right next to the bowl of oat meal at the same time as well, as I had it sitting there for quite a bit of some time, but I still had yet to take a single sip out of the cup. I shook my head, as I was not sure as to what was going on with me at this very moment either.
If I did not eat this food, and drink of this water, than I would not be able to sustain, and make it through this day that was ahead of me. I looked back at my father finally, at the exact same time as well, as I then nodded to him, to let him know that I had heard as to what it was that he had said, and that I was going to do so now.
Though I still felt like I did not want to eat, I began to bite in to the yummy oat meal that was below me, as once I took the first bite, it then hit me all at once, just how hungry I had been in the very first place, as I began to bite in to it over and over again, not giving a care in the world as to if it made a mess or not.
My father looked away from me finally, as I was thankful for it at the same time too, as there was at least one thing that he had remembered from our past life, which was of course, that he knew that I did not like to be put under any sort of stressful circumstances, as my brain just seemed to stop on me all at once, at the same time as well.
It was one thing that John seemed to not get about me either, as it felt like I was under a constant amount of stress when ever I was any where near him as well. I had told him that I did not like to be put under any sort of stress, but of course his response had to be, 'you will only be around that once we go in to a battle against the dragons'.
I knew that he was right, as it was going to be terrible for me, but I really did not want to think on all of that at the exact moment either, as I really was not sure as to why he could not just take it one slow step at a time, as it seemed to be to me at least, that he always seemed to be in some sort of rush to get things done, and he never really took a moment to enjoy life.
Well... I suppose, there was not all that much to enjoy in life at this very moment, as it kind of hurt me, as I then began to stop biting in to the oat meal that I was nearly done with at this point as well, as I let those thoughts soak in to my head at the exact same time too, as to the fact that there really was nothing good left in the world.
All that I had left was the eager hunger to get revenge on the dragons that had done this to my mother, and had done this to Pop, as well as the rest of the world to. I did not care how many dragons that I had to get through, to get to Plyma, as I wanted to be one to put the dagger in to his soft spot.
Now I really felt like I was acting the way that it seemed that John liked to act a lot of the time, as I knew that I had to just take all of this one step at a time, so that maybe, some day, my dreams might come true. As for some odd reason I grinned at those thoughts at the same time as well.
I looked over to my father, to make sure that he had not noticed, which luckily enough he did not have his eyes on me any longer, as he seemed to be perfectly content with me, after he had got me to bite in to my meal. Speaking of my meal as well, I still had yet to finish it off just yet, as I looked at the bowl.
There was simply just a few bites left, as I knew that I should just finish it off, but for some reason, just like before, I did not feel like I wanted to eat any thing at all at this very moment, as I then stared at the bowl, such as I had done just a few moments ago, as if I would get all the answers that I had asked the world, from that bowl of nearly empty oatmeal too.
I shook my head, as I did not want to finish it off, as I picked up the bowl and I began to carry it over to the sink, to where I would pour out the rest in to the trash that was in the trash can below, and I would rinse out the rest in to the drain down the sink that I would use to clean it with.
Once I was there, I did as such, as I then poured out the remaining oat meal that was left, as I knew that it was a waste of food, as I was sure that a lot of the people would be very upset at me if they knew that I had thrown away oat meal in a trash can, as I knew that they would do any thing for some thing as tasty as that right now.
I did not care though, as I filled up the rest of the bowl with water, and I then left it in the sink, for my sister to finish off when ever she came in to the sink to clean off all of the dishes, such as she did every afternoon. I shook my head, as it now felt like, finally, I was now ready to get started with my day, as I looked over at my father.
My father did not seem to be paying me any sort of attention at first, as for some reason he seemed to just be staring at some painting that was on the wall of the kitchen at the same time as well. How ever, it seemed to be that he had noticed me from the corner of his eye, as to the fact that I was standing still beside the kitchen sink, as he all of the sudden turned his head over to me.
He looked at me for a few seconds, as I could tell he had a bit of a confused look on his face at the exact same time as well, as to why I was looking at him at this very moment. I rolled my eyes a bit, as I let out a reasonably loud sigh at the same time too, to make sure that he had heard it, and that I actually had his attention on me.
My father looked at me for just a little bit more of some time, as he then all of the sudden nodded to me, as he seemed to understand just as to what it was that I had been getting at in the very first place, at the exact same time too. I nodded back to him, as I then began to speak up to my father at the same time as well.
"Alright... Let's go meet up with John then..." I said to him, as I was now fully ready to get all of this started with, as I saw him grin at me for some strange and odd reason or another. I was not amused at all how ever, as I squinted my eyes at him, and I kept a blank look on my face as well.
He shook his head, as he then got up from the table, as he nodded to me once he was up, and he then began to head all the way over to the door way that led out of the kitchen, and in to the hall way, which also of course, led right to the front door to the house, and right to where John was waiting for the both of us on the front porch.
I nodded back to my father, though I knew that he had not noticed it at all how ever, as his body was already ahead of me, and he had his eyes on the hall way that was in front of him. I let out a bit of a soft sigh this time, as I then began to walk over to where he was at, at the door way out of the kitchen.
Once he heard my foot steps, which were quite a bit loud, due to the fact that the floors of the house were quite a bit squeaky, he then nodded to him self at the same time as well, as he then began to walk down the hall way, over to where the front door was at. I could tell that he was not quite ready for all of this, as he was not ready for John at all, as well as the fact that he was not quite ready to get all of this started.
I knew this first day was really just to get our selves to know our partners for a bit, and to find out what all of us were good at, at the exact same time too, but it still did not relax us at all, as to the fact that we were about to have to meet a bunch of people that we had never spoken to in our lives more than likely, as well as train with them.
I shook my head though, as I shook off all of those thoughts, as I felt like at this point, I had done enough thinking on all of that, and I was now ready to just get all of this started. I blinked a few times, as I then saw my father grab on to the door knob for just a few seconds, as I could tell that he was a bit hesitant to go through.
I knew that my father was a bit like me, on the fact that he was a bit of an introvert, well, of course, unless he was drunk, as usually when he was like that, than he would talk all sorts of shit about a whole bunch of people. I shook off those thoughts, as I knew that he did not want to speak to these people now that he was fully sober how ever.
I knew his face, and his name had been told about all through out city, and it was a bit embarrassing to him, as most of what was said about him was not good at all. I did not feel bad for him for it how ever, as I knew that it had all been stuff that he had put on him self any ways.
I stared at the door knob for just a little bit longer, as I then saw him turn it a bit, as he slowly began to open the door to the front porch, and the exit to the big house that we lived in, at the exact same time too. That's when it then began to flick, as I remembered just how important this day was, not just for us, but more importantly, for me.
I nodded to my self, as I saw my father nod to me, as he was waiting for me to follow him out side. I saw him walk out the front door to the house, and I quickly began to follow him at the same time as well, as it all of the sudden would seem to be, that I was acting a bit excited about all of this, which of course was not the case at all.
I shook off those thoughts how ever, as I felt the cold autumn breeze fly over me as well, as I then began to look around, on the front porch, to see as to where John was positioned at, as it always seemed to be, that he could never find one single chair that he could say was his favorite, and he liked to sit on every time he was on the front porch.
For a few seconds, I first thought that he was not on the front porch at all, as I could not see him any where at all, but as I looked around for just a little bit longer how ever, I finally then spotted him not all too far away, on a chair a bit further back, as it seemed to be that he had his eyes on the field, and that he had not noticed the both of us join him on the front porch.
I knew that was not the case how ever, as I knew that he knew damn well that the both of us were right near him, but he just chose to not pay us any sort of attention at all at this very moment, for just a bit of some time. It kind of annoyed me a bit when he was like that as well, as I just wanted to make sure that he was there, and that the plans were still a go.
I knew that they were how ever, as we had been planning this since for ever, and it did not make any sort of sense at all, as to why we would all of the sudden have a change of plans. There was far too many people waiting on us, for us to do as such as well, so I knew that not to be the case at all.
I shook my head all at once, as I finally then saw John turn his head over to the both of us, as he then nodded to us at the exact same time too. Me and my father did not hesitate to nod back to him, as we waited for him to speak, which did not seem to be the case at all, as I noticed him put his eyes back on to the field ahead of him.
I rolled my eyes, as I felt like I just wanted to give up at this point, and that perhaps, I might want to break some thing, as if I was a little child. I just wanted to get this over with at this point, and just get this day started, as I looked at my father at the same time as well, to see that it seemed to be that he was thinking just the same as I was.
Besides, was there not a whole lot of people waiting on us, such as John had told me? I blinked a few times, as I all of the sudden, in just the blink of an eye, saw that John had his eyes back on the both of us. I was still a bit confused, but finally, it seemed like John was ready to speak to us, as I had me ears and eyes out, as I then listened to what it was that he had to say to me and my father, at the exact same time as well.
"Alright you 2... Are you guys ready to meet them?"