The Upside of Falling Back To You

chapter thirty nine | three idiots and a bakery

I TAKE HIS OFFER barely a week later.

It was mid-afternoon when I showed up at his front door, the doorman downstairs already knowing my face well enough to let me come up. Though, I'm pretty sure I woke Ronan up from a nap, his grogginess present on his face when he opens the door.

I put down the duffle bag. "Okay, look. I know what I said last week. But I... I can't be there. You know how I said I liked my house and my room because it was familiar, and it just felt comfortable?" Ronan looked a bit more awake, nodding. "Yeah, well, I realised I can't really tell myself that anymore. Like, Griff moving out was one thing, and then not that long after Mom is gone. Dad's barely home and, gosh, I feel like I shouldn't be saying this out loud but Cas in the other room, knowing he's not my full blood brother, it's off. Dinner is off because Dad still can't look at him. I'm stuck, and you know what, I think I need that change of scenery."

I could see the corner of Ronan's mouth twitch up. "Of course, Aster-"

"But I have some requests." I look down at watch him pick up my bag. "I'm not- this is temporary, okay? I just need... need somewhere to clear my head, okay? Because right now at home I can't do that. Like I might go back home."

"Okay, that's fine-"

"And it's not like I'm your roommate, okay? Like, I don't want a key to your place, Ronan. I just..." Could I explain this? "I don't want a key to your place. It's like, you know, you're having a friend stay over. You don't give your friends keys to your place-"

"Lucas has a key-"

"Okay, but Lucas isn't me, okay. It's different. And I want to sleep on the so-called shitty mattress in your guest room, okay?"

Ronan tilts his head. "Asteria, are you sure you're okay? I have no issue with making another copy of my key-"

"NO! I mean, no, it's... Ronan, please. I can't... I can't put it in words but I'm sort of taking your offer, but not really, but, um, yeah."

He's still confused. I know I made it confusing. "So whenever you need a place to work or stay over, call and make sure I'm home. Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Okay." He opens the door wide open. "Come on in."

☙

IT'S BEEN LIKE that for a few weeks now. Nights before I had work were when I usually stayed over, simply because it was much closer than driving from home. Cas was one of my initial worries about spending so much time away from home, but he was alright with it. More than that - ecstatic, actually. I think he was still hoping that Ronan and I were going to get back together.

One of the downsides of this: the rumors. The media still gets on my nerves. Since the night Ronan found me at the bar, it feels like paparazzi was following me around even more closely. And with me going to his apartment so often? Well, that clearly meant one thing to the fans: Ronan and I were dating.

Ivana came up to me after work to talk about it. "So you're telling me you still somehow managed to not fuck him? Asteria, please, you're breaking my heart. What are you even doing at his place?"

"Since when has the rule been that friends over at each other's homes meant they were dating?" I asked, packing my stuff. "I just spend a few nights over, it's no big deal. I just sit on his balcony and do work, sleep over so I don't have to drive to work, and like, make dinner some nights, breakfast in the morning, and-" I found myself lowering my voice. "-I've been helping him with some song production and stuff."

"He's making new music?" Ivana asked, a bit too loudly. Other co-workers turned our way momentarily. "You're helping? You both agreed to that and aren't making it awkward?"