Namjoon: Bus Stop

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Alpha! Namjoon

Summary: Having decided to leave Namjoon, you get as far as the bus stop before everything starts to unravel.

Trigger warning: Emotional manipulation


It was all becoming too much. It had only been 6 months, but you noticed how entangled your life had become with Namjoons. You had once been so independent, but now everything from your job, your friends, your home, all of it was centred around him. Of course, boyfriends and girlfriends become a part of the other's life, but not like this. You'd never had any relationship like this before.

You'd felt like this for a few weeks, slowly noticing more and more how intertwined you were becoming. But it was hard to say anything to him. You owed him so much. The only reason you weren't living on the street right now was because of him. But you couldn't take it anymore.

You knew if you sat down with him to talk it out, that you'd end up caving on all of your points. He has a way with words- with reason, that you just can seem to argue against.

So you decided to take the cowards' way out. You left a note on the kitchen counter while he was in the shower, stuffing your clothes in your suitcase, and hiking through town to the bus station. You weren't sure what you were going to do once you got back to the city, but you knew you needed to get there and try to begin again.

After 3/4 of an hour of waiting, you see the intercity bus arriving in the distance. Only to watch it ignore you completely and drive past you, leaving you in the dark.

Doubt was already starting to seep in. You can help but think you must be cursed. Without Namjoon you always seem to be overlooked and ignored, falling into bad luck and shitty circumstances.

Frustrated, you have no choice but to wait for the next one.

But Namjoon is quicker to find you than the bus is to arrive. He walks up, sitting on the bench beside you staring straight ahead.

"Where are you going?" He asks calmly. Your letter had explained that you needed to go back to the city to see if you could find yourself and start yourself again, but you guessed he just needs to hear it from your own mouth.

"I'm sorry Joon," You start, not able to build the courage to look at him. "I need to go back."

He sighs, stretching his neck. "I understand Y/n. I just want you to be happy." You can hear the sad acceptance in his voice. "I know you need to do this yourself. You need to rebuild your life. Be independent." He nods, biting his jaw, trying to keep himself composed.

You can't believe it. You were so sure that he would fight you on this. That he would argue for you to stay. A flood of relief overcomes you. You don't like to see him hurting, but you're so relieved that he understands.

"Thank you, Joon. Thank you for understanding." You scoot closer to him, putting a comforting hand on his arm. "I really appreciate everything you've done. But it's time for me to stop relying on you."

He nods, giving you a small comforting smile. "I know. I just worry about you Y/N. Can you tell me what your plan is at least?"

You don't have an answer to that. You struggled already so much last time when you lost your job and your apartment. The best you have come up with is that you have a friend or two who might still talk to you. You hope you can stay with one of them until you are earning money again.

"I don't really know," you admit, not wanting to reveal in full how shaky your plan of action is.

"Well, we still have," he looks at his watch, "38 minutes until the next intercity comes. Let me help you one last time, and we can talk it through." He suggests somberly.

You nod. He's very smart. Brainstorming with him is not a bad idea, and you're hoping if he sees your resolve it will satisfy his concern for you.

"I was thinking I would go to see my friend, Sarah. The last time I was let go, she said I could stay with her. I'll stay there a few weeks while I look for a new job."

He turns to you, crossing his legs, resting his knee on the bench. "Didn't Sarah just have a baby? Do you think she'll still have room for you?" He asks.

"Oh? I mean I think so." You nod, thinking for a moment. She only did have a two-bedroom apartment. And her husband wasn't too keen on the idea the first time around. "But if not, I'm sure Kevin or Bec wouldn't mind. So I think I'll be able to find somewhere to stay."

He thinks for a minute. "Kevin's the guy that was always hitting on you when he drinks?" He tilts his head to the side. "Do you think it's a good idea to stay with him? He might expect something in return. And Rebecca only has a studio apartment, right? You didn't find a job after nearly 3 months. Would she let you stay with her that long?"

His memory always astounds you. He remembers everything you ever tell him.

The more he questions you, the more uncertain you feel about how much you can rely on these people. You burnt so many bridges when you left, and you're not even sure if your relationships with them are free from scorches either. You'd messaged all of them in the last week and hadn't received any replies yet.

You only have enough money saved to stay a week or two in a motel and then you'd be stranded. And there is no way you would or could reach out to your family for help.

Anxiety is starting to set in as your optimism slips.

"I'm sorry Y/n. I just want you to be safe." He takes hold of your hand, seeing the reservation in your eyes.

You both sit quietly a few minutes more. You're thinking up and down your contact book of people that you might be able to get help from. Your concentration breaking every few thoughts to chastise yourself. How could you have been so stupid as to ruin so many relationships in such a short period of time?

"I have a compromise." Namjoon interrupts the silence. "We both know your intentions. We know you need to leave and start your life over. But right at this moment, you're missing a few of the tools to do that. Every beginning needs preparation. So come back, temporarily, and save up so you can support yourself. Reconnect with your friends, start talking with your business connections again. Then when you're prepared you can go back to the city certain you'll succeed. I'll even help you find a new job and a new apartment. Or I can completely stay out of it. Your choice." He smiles reassuringly.

"I-" You trail off, not sure how to refute such a reasonable plan. Or if you even want to.

"What's the alternative Y/n? I can't stand the idea of you ending up alone with nothing and no one. I need to know you're going to be safe. You owe me that much." He pleads with concern in his eyes.

You sigh lightly. He's right. And once again he's being so selfless. How can you refuse?

Nodding, you smile softly, feeling somehow both relieved and defeated at the same time. "Yeah, okay."

Smiling a bit wider, his shoulders release and he sits easier. He stands, holding his hand down for you, taking your suitcase in the other. "Come on, let's go home."

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