The Exiled Gem

Feelings and Fears

'Look Alexandra,' Liam began, as soon as the last one had left, 'I do believe you. No matter what.' And the expression his eyes carried - the confidence - had somewhere become endearing. Alexandra had heard of a smile reaching someone's eyes, but Liam's pair shone with all the expressions there could be. She was so very sure that she wouldn't ever grow tired of sitting and gazing into them.

And it wasn't the best time for it, but she couldn't help smiling.

'I know, Liam!' She replied, 'I don't mind - and, that's a valid doubt. I am Dovish. I could be helping my brother. It's like expecting everybody to blindly trust me, it's impossible.'

He didn't respond immediately, giving her more time to find other emotions in his eyes. But all she found was an ocean of charm, pulling her within, threatening to drown her. As time had passed - it had become easier and easier to face Liam. In that literal sense, because previously, he had felt - if not completely - largely intimidating. Superior - higher. Those were things of the past now. They had each other's trust - and beyond all that, they had always been so frank and direct that there was simply no scope of a misunderstanding. Besides, as far as formidable eyes were concerned, Diana's green pair were the troublesome ones. They looked straight out of a mossy lake - dangerous in every sense.

'You're telling me that the whole, gigantic speech I just gave - was for nothing. You did NOT say that. I know you didn't.' He said, after a short pause, which made Alexandra laugh.

'No - of course not. That wasn't a speech, and I felt you were giving me a little more credit than deserved. But it was nice,' she added, with a mischievous grin. 'I was furious, and when I am angry I don't frame sentences well - or speak my mind out perfectly. You told everything I wanted to, and coming from you it sounded-' but she caught herself midway, lest her incorrigible tongue let slip any comment that could betray her feelings. 'It sounded more right, and sounded truer. For the base of it, Liam - I didn't expect it. I didn't expect you to risk antagonizing all of them, whom you've known since - I don't know, but you have certainly known them for longer than you have known me. And all that "why'd you do it" and "you shouldn't have done it", I am not going to say those - because I just - enjoyed listening to it.'

The single line that Alexandra didn't add there, or possibly couldn't add there, was - It was bold, it was a tad bit over-confident and it was certainly not the best course of action, but now that you've done it, I love you all the more.

After saying all that, and not saying a few things, she wasn't done with speaking. But before continuing, Alexandra had one sweeping look of the Meeting Hall. It seemed much bigger now. The chair pushed back by each of the nobles for leaving, were scattered. And if she were to raise her volume, she was very sure there would be a gigantic echo. Where were they headed? The war was over, people could soon be parting ways - most of whom she knew were already engaged, a few were married. It somehow rang the bell that the age of looking after the career was over, perhaps now was the age of looking at the personal side of life. Alexandra, as far as she knew, had a non-existent personal life. No interests, not hobby-wise not heart-wise. No special interest in a fellow human - apart from the one sitting right next to her. And he didn't seem largely inclined to make any move, and Alexandra knew she was not confessing first. It was as if they had locked horns and were seeing who was pushed to confess the feelings first. But it was more peculiar in Alexandra's own case. She had nothing to fear - her proposal would be gladly received. But in her stubbornness, she just knew she was not doing it. The silence was stretching for longer than necessary, and for now, she decided to break it. 'You said you are decided upon what that next step should be. Mind sharing it with me?'

'Not yet,' he replied, swiftly. 'I have no conclusion yet,' and then catching Alexandra's confused stare, he got up. That put so much difference in their heights that she was afraid she wouldn't be able to hear him anymore and made use of her own legs to straighten up. Liam seemed to be thinking, for he drifted to the chair the treasurer had occupied, pushed it towards the table and leaned onto it. Alexandra crossed her arms and followed him, but when she realized he was walking aimlessly, pushed back another chain and put her back against it. 'You see, I first need to know what Austin,' and he threw her half a glance, perhaps to make sure that she wasn't revolting against the very topic. Even such a small, attentive gesture pleased Alexandra heartily. 'What Austin exactly said.' Liam finished.