The Pogue Life || JJ Maybank

Big John's message

Once we are back at John B's, JJ heads straight for the kitchen, motivated solely by his stomach at this point. Pope spots JJ making a sandwich in the kitchen and screws his face up in disgust.

"That bread had mould on it three days ago," he informs the blonde.

"Yeah, I'll just pull off the bad parts. Plus; mould is good for you. It's just a natural organism," JJ says, continuing to make his sandwich.

"JJ," Kie calls, summoning the blonde to the living room, where John B sits in front of a candle with the parcel.

"Yup. Hot damn. Let's do it," my boyfriend replies, running over to join the rest of us. He stands beside me and I look from the sandwich to his face in disgust.

John B rips open the parcel as JJ takes a bite of his sandwich, immediately gagging and spitting it into his hand. He walks away to discard it and the remaining four of us focus our full attention on John B. He pulls out a map and smooths it onto the table.

"Holy shit," he mutters.

"Oh. X marks the spot," Pope says, pointing to a little black X near the top left of the map.

"Longitude, latitude. Wait, there's something else in there," John B says.

He picks the parcel up again and sticks his hand in. He pulls out a black tape recorder. Kie and I glance at each other, her face clearly displays her shock. JJ rejoins the group and looks at the object in John B's hands.

"What's that?"

"It's a tape recorder, dumbass," Kie states.

I place my hand on John B's shoulder, "do you want us to go? Give you some space?"

"What? No! I wanna hear," JJ whines.

I shoot my boyfriend a harsh glare and he shuts his mouth instantly. John B turns the recorder over in his hands a few times.

"It might be personal," I continue, "do you want to listen to it alone first?"

"No," John B says in a quiet voice. He clears his voice and repeats himself, "no, I want you guys to hear it. You helped me get it."

I nod and rub his shoulder in support. He presses the play button on the recorder and a scratchy male voice begins talking. Since I never had the chance to meet him, I can only presume it's Big John, John B's father.

"Dear Bird," he begins.

"Who's Bird?" JJ questions.

"That's what my Dad called me," John B replies quietly. The sadness and longing is evident in his voice.

"I hate to say 'I told you so,' but I told you so. And you doubted your old man. I suspect at this moment you're filled with guilt and self-loathing over our last fight. But, don't kill yourself just yet, kid. I didn't expect to find the merchant either," Big John says.

As the talking ceases for a moment and the voice recorder emits sounds of clattering and shuffling, we all look at each other. None of us really know how to feel. This is shocking. It's also incredible. But mostly, it's depressing. From what we can guess, this is a message from the grave. None of us want to believe that John B's dad really is dead but it's been nearly a year now and things aren't looking good. We've all been thinking it for a while, and John B has been doing his best to live in denial, because "it's only denial if you're wrong." I can't help but feel sorry for John B in this moment. I squeeze his shoulder to let him know we are here for him.

"You were probably right to call me out. Wasn't exactly father of the decade. What can I say kid? I could smell the barn. And hopefully we're listening to this in our brand new sugar-shack down in Costa Rica livin' off passive investments and pulling on permits. If not, and you find this for less than optimal reasons, well, that's what the map is for. There she is; the wreck of the Merchant. If somethin' happens to me, finish what I started. Go for the gold, kid. I love you, Bird, even if I didn't always act like it. I'll see you on the other side."