The Pogue Life || JJ Maybank

Bad dad jokes

"Well, well, well," Pope says with an excited grin.

"That was a good Dad joke," John B says, his face the picture of shock as he crouches down to look into it.

"They built this part of the house right over it," Kie points out.

"This is where she hid the bodies," JJ comments.

"Bodies? Plural?" I say as Pope punches him in the arm and tells him to shut up.

"No, I'm dead serious," he continues, "it was never an outhouse."

"DEAD serious? Ha, get it?" I ask, eliciting a disappointed look from Pope, "but Mrs. Crain probably doesn't even know it's here, let's be honest."

"So, we found water," Pope says, looking over to John B.

"We're gonna need a really big rope," he responds, a shit-eating grin growing on his face.

"As fucking if. No way did we actually find it," JJ says, completely in shock.

"We actually did," Kiara agrees, "but we should really get our asses out of here before Crain finds us. We can sort our shit and come back at some stage."

"Not to mention John B needs to get his ass back to Tanneyhill before daddy Ward gets him in trouble," JJ jokes, "wouldn't wanna lose the GOLDen boy title."

"Seriously, what is with you pair and the dad jokes? JJPope got a baby on the way?" John B retorts.

"I think you're forgetting that Bianca was the one with the bad pun earlier," Pope points out.

I roll my eyes and stand up. "We should move the floorboard back, just in case."

John B nods and the rest of them stand up and help me put it back. We sneak out of the basement as quietly as we can and make our way back to the twinkie. We're all buzzing with excitement and I realise from the constant bouncing of JJ's leg that he isn't going to fall asleep very easily tonight, which most likely means he'll keep me awake with his tossing and turning.

I'm proved wrong when JJ waits out the front and quickly smokes a blunt while I sneak upstairs for a shower. Once I get out, I crawl into bed and he soon makes his way in and to the shower, pressing a gentle kiss to my forehead and promising to try not to wake me when he gets out. He showers quickly and gently climbs into bed beside me, being cautious to not disturb me because he thinks I'm asleep. He stays on his side of the bed, obviously trying not to wake me. I roll over and bury my head in his chest. He instantly wraps me in his arms and presses a kiss to my hair before his breathing evens out and he falls asleep. I follow suit as exhaustion takes over.

Neither of us moves through the night, which is evident from the fact that we are still wrapped in one another arms when we wake up and both have indentations from the pillows and blankets across our arms and faces. We both wake with groans of annoyance as someone knocks on the bedroom door.

"Oi, sleeping beauties, if you don't get up - or at least surface- you're gonna miss pancakes," Zac's voice calls through the door.

"More for you," I half-yell, half-groan back, pulling the blankets over my head.

"Actually, I could kind of smash some pancakes," JJ ponders out loud, "what d'ya say, princess?"

I groan loudly, "seriously?"

"Hey, treasure hunting makes me hungry!" He protests.

"Ugh, whatever," I say, rolling onto my back so he can get up.

"You really not gonna come get breakfast?" he asks as he slips his shirt over his head.

I just groan in response and he tosses a t-shirt dress onto the bed beside me, saying, "Ill meet you down there with coffee at the ready, okay grumpy?"

I roll my eyes but sit up and grab the dress anyway.

When I make it downstairs, JJ has come through on his promise. He pulls out my chair at the table and I sit down to a full plate of pancakes and a fresh mug of coffee. I try to squash the smile on my face but everyone catches it. In true brotherly fashion, Zac pretends to gag while Mum jokes about getting the camera and Dad is suddenly very interested in his own pancakes.

"You know, I thought the kids would really struggle to find friends when we moved here, especially since it was the start of summer and they wouldn't have school to help them, but JJ you just wormed your way into this family brilliantly," mum says.

JJ looks at her with a shocked expression, "into the family?"

"Well, yeah, sweetie. You're part of the family now. No escaping it," Mum jokes.

"Don't give him any ideas, honey. Call him son-in-law and next thing you know I'll be paying for a wedding," Dad responds.

I choke on my pancake, "w- wedding?"

"You know, the thing where the girl wears a big poofy white dress and walks down an isle? They tend to say 'I do' a lot," Zac says, his voice thick with sarcasm.

"I know what a wedding is dumbass," I say, "and we're not there, Dad. Not yet."

"yet?" JJ whispers, sounding terrified.

"Oh cool it," I say, putting a hand on his thigh, "Don't get all stressed about commitment and stuff. It's not like we're having kids."

"KIDS?! That's it! No more sleepover's!"

Zac sniggers, "now you're screwed."

"But Dad-"

"Mr. Anderson, I promise, we use protection every time. I mean sometimes I don't even-"

"You shut your mouth right now," I demand, slapping a hand over JJ's face.

My dad's face is filled with anger and it's all directed at JJ. I look at my Mum with a 'help me' expression and she has a hand up to her forehead and a mixture of shock, horror and disappointment on her face. Zac, naturally, is laughing his ass off. I kick him under the table, but the laughter only pauses for about two seconds for him to shoot me a glare.

"Yeah, I'm gonna recommend you run," I say to JJ, taking a big swig of coffee and standing up.

"Probably a good idea," Dad says in a menacing tone.

JJ gulps loudly before standing up and backing away. He knocks into the cabinet behind him and has to catch a photo frame that falls. He stumbles to put it back, trying to keep an eye on my dad the whole time. He pauses for a second, making eye contact with my dad before he finally takes off, literally sprinting for the front door.

"I'm, uh, gonna head ou-"

"Sit your ass down and finish your pancakes, young lady," My dad orders.

I obey, resuming my pancakes with nervous looks up to my dad every ten seconds to check if his anger is subsiding. It's not.

We eat the rest of breakfast in silence and then Zac and I load the dishwasher before I bail out. I run upstairs to change clothes and then haul ass out the door, avoiding my dad like the plague.

Upon editing I did chop this chapter in half coz it was nearly 3000 words.
Now important question: have Bianca and JJ said "I love you" yet? I can't remember. Update: I re-read it and they say it in 'Broken' and it was really cute. Not sure how I forgot