Clone Trooper Oneshots

Fives&Echo/Breaking the Habit

Plot: You are struggling with depression and you hide it from your two best friends so they don't worry about you.

Song of Inspiration: Linkin Park - Breaking the Habit
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Memories consume
Like opening the wound
I'm picking me apart again

You stood in your own refresher tightly holding your antidepressants. You thought to the moment when you got diagnosed, it was only three years ago. You weren't doing the things you loved and went to go see a doctor about the problem. Your mental health had declined over the past few days after you got diagnosed. You hated this, you just wanted the suffering to end already.

You all assume
I'm safe here in my room
Unless I try to start again

You told some of your friends and family about it but they said that it was a phase, you'll get over it. Them saying that made your depression worse. From then on, you started to see a therapist to cope with your mental illness. Therapy wasn't working for you, so you resorted to the last thing you didn't want to do, self-harm.

I døn't wa₦t to bɇ tⱨe one

₮he battⱡes al₩ays choø₴e

'₵ause łnsiđe I re₳lizɇ
Th₳t I'm the ø₦e ₵on₣ʉsed

Sure, it hurt at first but you could handle it. Over time, your cutting habit got out of control and now you can't stop. You always had to wear long sleeves to hide your cuts so no one was worried about you. You had become a hollow shell that only knew sadness and how to fake a smile.

I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean

You had met Fives and Echo when they were sent to protect the town you lived in. You had bonded with the two when you got caught in a fire and they came to save you. They asked you if you were okay and you said that you were fine even though you were mentally screaming for help. They took you and a few other survivors back to Coruscant and got your wounds treated. Since then, they have been your best friends for two years.

I don't know how I got this way
I know it's not alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit, tonight

You opened your medication bottle and took out one pill. You set it on the counter as you closed the bottle and filled a glass with water. You put the pull in your mouth and took a drink of water, making it go down your throat. You then took the blade that was sitting on the counter and hovered it over wrist.

'Why am I hesitating? I've done this before.' You thought.

You put down the knife and sighed as you put your hands on your face. You walked out of the refresher and towards the door leading into a hallway. Because you were great friends with Fives and Echo, General Skywalker had been generous and gave you your own room near the barracks. Speaking of him, you spotted him walking down the hallway with his padawan, Ahsoka.

Clutching my cure
I tightly lock the door
I try to catch my breath again

"Hey, (Y/n)! Would you like to walk with us?" Ahsoka asked you with enthusiasm.

"Sure." You simply said, faking a smile.

You took your place next to her and started to match their pace. They were talking about future missions and you looked down, not really interested. You began to wonder why you weren't dead yet.