The Story of Us (Fili/The Hobbit)

30. Pretend It's Okay

Thorin had ordered us to get ready for the battle. Choosing our weapons and having our armor set to wear on that day. I had already chosen my sword, it was the one I grabbed the other day. I decided to stick with it. I had to admit, it was one piece of fine weaponry. I couldn't wish for a finer blade.
From the corner of my eye, I could see Thorin giving little Bilbo a type of dwarfish armor. Mithril. From what I heard, no blade could pierce it. It was a token of their friendship. It made me smile knowing they had a friendship that couldn't be broken. At least Thorin fully trusts Bilbo. I haven't a clue how Thorin feels about how I reacted that other time. But I know it must not be good.

I felt that I should not linger so long in the presence of the Dwarf King, so I wandered back to the chamber I had apparently claimed since I went in there a lot. The only reason I went in there was for some alone time. To clear my mind and get away from reality. It seemed exactly what I needed.

I sat down with my back against the wall, in my hand was a small horse toy that I found in the room. I couldn't hold back the tears that were forming. A hundred thoughts were racing through my mind. Some were of how stubborn Thorin is. But most were of the oncoming war. Squeezing the little horse figure in my palms, I let out quiet sobs as my head hung low.

I didn't even have to look up for me to know it was Fili who opened the door and sat by me. He cradled me into his arms as he ran his fingers through my hair.
"Shh it's alright, I'm here. Now tell me, what troubles you, darling? Is it about my uncle again?" He asked softly.

I slowly raised my head up to meet his worried gaze.
"Everything," I managed to choke out.
"It's about everything. I'm scared, Fili. I shouldn't be but I am."

He moved some hair out of my face and tucked it back whilst I let out silent cries on his shoulder.
"I lost most of my family because of war. I lost my father that way. I can't bear the thought of loosing anyone else. Including yo-" I said but he interrupted, shaking his head.

"No. Don't even say that. Nothing can take me away from you."

"You don't even know that. It could also be me. What if I will share the same fate as my family?" I questioned.

"You and I will both come out of this battle alive. I'm sure of it."

"Stop pretending like it's okay! We have no clue what could happen!" More tears began to spill from my eyes.

"El," he sighed in desperation.

"I just can't stand the thought of loosing you."

"You will never loose me, Eleanor. I truly love you with all my heart and I will do anything to remain with you. It makes me sick to think of you injured, never mind what I would feel if I lost you completely. I can't say this enough times for you to understand how much you mean to me. I love you." He gently grabbed my face in his hands and pressed a loving kiss to my lips.

I smiled as I snuggled closer to him, my head resting in the crook of his neck.

"Le melin, Fili. As long as the sun shines and the moon glows, even hidden from our sight I shall always love you." I said to him, and I meant every single word.

~*~
The next day, we went back to the battle settlements, exposing ourselves to the elf army once again. Bard and an all-to-familiar Elven King stood outside. Why they came back was what I was wondering about considering it wasn't too long ago when Thorin refused to give the gold to Bard.
But no, they were here to offer Thorin another deal.
I doubt he would agree to whatever they have to say. Thorin has developed a deep hatred for both of them. And ever since he laid his eyes upon the treasure, he hasn't been in a good mood lately. It had always been me to anger him but I didn't care.

We will just have to wait and see where this conversation will lead us.

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(Le Melin = I love you)

heyy you lovely people!1! I noticed I've been updating frequently lately.. Is that a good thing?? Haha. So yeah, get ready for the next chapter. Cuz it's gonna be intense. YUS.😱