Abandoned

Chapter 42: Exposure

nobody knows by mansionz, Soren Bryce

The alarm on her phone buzzed underneath her pillow. Lyria had spent hours on her phone stalking all her old friends on instagram. She saw Amelia with so many girls. Girls that were prettier, skinnier, better, than Lyria. And she couldn't help but notice it. Pansy had crashed in some sixth year's dorm so Lyria was left to her own. She shuffled to the end of her bed and looked at herself through the mirror across the room. She couldn't stop the sadness and regret that flooded through her chest. She saw how her neck got all squishy and fat when she looked down. The way her thighs looked huge when they pressed into her bed. When she pinched her arm, there was so much extra skin between her fingers. Lyria flipped her forearm to stare at the dark mark but you could still see the sectumsempra scars underneath. They were raised and a few shades paler than her normal skin tone. Lyria pulled her knees into her chest as she continued to look at each and every one of her flaws in the mirror. Her skin was pulled everso tight around her ribs and the thought made her release a small smile. She could see the contours of the bones in her knees.

Eventually she realized that she had to get ready and couldn't just sit in bed all day, she'd already missed too many classes. And she couldn't pull the sick card without having to go down to Madam Pomfrey. She slowly pulled her hair into two dutch braids that rested down her back. It didn't take very long with her shortened hair. Standing up, she made her way over to her wardrobe. Lyria pulled on a pair of green plaid pajama pants and found an emerald green zip up hoodie to go over her sports bra. If she was skipping the uniform she might as well wear her house colors. Pulling out her phone, she checked the time. However she never actually noticed the numbers at the top of the screen. Instead she stared at the picture on her lockscreen. It was of Blaise, Draco, Pansy, Theo and her. Everyone was smiling. When she pressed her finger to the photo, it moved and she could see the rest of the 4 second video. Laughter escaped their mouths and people held each other close, trying to regain control. Lyria couldn't help but feel disassociated with it. It didn't feel like that was her. She didn't really feel anything. She just felt numb and sad, stuck staring in a loop of an entirely different person.

Lyria slid her feet into her fuzzy slides as she picked up her backpack and walked out the door. Her dorm relocking itself the moment the door closed. Draco had been waiting for her in the common room and was relieved when he saw her walking down the stairs. His moment of relief, however, was short lived. He could see that something was wrong. She never left without putting herself together and right now, she looked like a complete mess. Her clothes looked way too big for her even though the material wasn't that large. Her skin looked like all the color had left it and her face looked sickly. Normally Lyria always had a full face of makeup on but without it, he could see how ill she really was.

"Are you o-" he was cut off by a glare from Lyria.

The last thing she wanted right now was to be asked if she was okay. She didn't have the energy to lie. Lyria interlinked her arm with his and she rested her head on his shoulder. She'd had a headache since the moment she'd woken this morning and internally begged for it to go away. But of course, it didn't. The great hall roared with hundreds of voices talking, laughing and arguing. Draco saw her wince at the volume so he casted a mild muffling charm around her so that the volume wouldn't be quite so intense. She sent him a small smile of gratitude.

Breakfast carried on. Everyone ate, Lyria didn't. She didn't talk much, opting to just lean on Draco and shut her eyes. Hoping this day would be over sooner rather than later. Lyria didn't really feel time passing, each minute both felt wicked fast and unbearably slow. When Draco nudged her side, she opened her eyes to see all her friends standing up, waiting for her to join them. Being startled, she jumped up to stand and immediately regretted it. Everything blurred, the edges of her vision swirled together. She felt herself falling but couldn't move to stop it. The blur turned into patches of darkness which progressed until everything was dark and quiet. She saw nothing. She felt nothing. She heard nothing. She was alone and it was.. peaceful, almost.