-TW-
Food
Chocolate cake
Or a sizzling hot apple pie
Began to look more like numbers
Numbers of calories
Numbers on a scale
Numbers that seem to yell at my face
What I once enjoyed and devoured
Became what I feared most
Every bite taken
Was when another wave of guilt rushed in
Every bite taken
Was when my thoughts turned against me
Every bite taken
Was when my eyes betrayed me
"You are so thin and flat"
A phrase I heard way too many times to count
A phrase that seemed to follow me for years
A phrase that came later to haunt me
They are never happy
Gain a few healthy pounds
And now you are fat
You are either too thin or too fat
There is no in-between
Just when you begin to feel pretty
They come and chase you with their fears
Because how else will they be happy
Commenting on the extra skin on your stomach
Or how your thighs seem to hug each other
Pointing out every little flaw that you just started to fall in love with
Shredding that acceptance into little unmendable pieces
So numbers on the scale begin to drop
More sleepless nights with starving bellies
More painful spines and exhausted bodies
More packets of gum laying around
More caffeine to substitute the hunger
The thing is
This never stops
Thin is never enough
So when is it?
Is it when bones begin to stick out
Or the dark bags under your eyes
Is it when you turn pale
Or when you begin to faint
You have to accept that you can't make them happy
Fall in love with the imperfections so you could be happy
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What Goes Unheard
PoetryThis is a collection of poems that I write along the way. It includes moments where I struggled a lot with certain things that others may find triggering or comforting since they would now know that they are no longer alone. A lot of the poems inclu...