𝐑𝐨𝐜𝐤𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫 {𝐇.𝐒}

Chapter Twenty-Three

Starlette

I needed to talk to Harry. I wanted to make him understand why I did that to him and why I said those harsh words. I had a reason—a motive on why I had to act so selfishly. If I didn't do something like that, I would've been interrogated and Harry would've been killed by my brother. In fact, my brother had already threatened to pull the trigger multiple times so I wouldn't put it past him to actually do it.

As I stare into Harry's cheutreuse green irises, I see myself. I see the woman who has caused so much pain for someone like Harry. I went to great measures to defend my brother when he was also to blame over those substances. Everything that happened between us left me no choice but to completely ruin it again and I really had no power of it since Alex did.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Harry booms as he grits his teeth. "I thought you had a little decency after everything that happened between us but I should've known better—you're the f*cken devil," he snarls. I see the blazing anger hold him hostage and I know it'll be a tough ride to get out of this.

"Harry, please don't say that. Look, you have to understand the situation. I'll explain it to you if you just listen to me-" I try but he silences me off with his harsh words.

"No, I'm sick of you trying to justify your selfish behaviour. I've tried so much to put the past behind us and open myself to you but you're not willing to do the same for me. Just leave, Starlette, just go," he snaps as he nods over to the door. I see the distaste on his face as he tightens his fists and clenches his jaw.

"No, listen here, Harry," I snap. Taking a step forward, I stare up into his eyes and hold his jaw in my right hand. He tries to rip it away but I hold my ground and hold it tightly. "You will listen to me and let me explain or else I'll leave and not even look back. Do you really want that, Harry?" I snap as I clench my jaw.

One thing I learnt is that you never give up on the people you love.

Taking a deep breath, he nods. I let go of his jaw and pull him onto the couch beside me. I knew this wasn't the way to do it but I needed him to listen to me no matter the ways. He leans back onto the couch as he stares at the wall and I can sense the anger behind him.

"Look, you need to understand that I was doing everything for you. That little stunt back there, I wasn't trying to hurt Mitch but I needed to do something so they wouldn't suspect me. If they did, I swear to God, this would get back to Alex and he'll kill you," I explain as I grip his thigh tightly. He looks down to my hand and back to my eyes.

"He can't kill me, Star. Even though he tried, he didn't have a chance against me-"

"But he would've if I didn't bail you out. He would've kept hitting you until you died. Harry, you don't understand how crazy my brother could get when he wants revenge. He's worse than me," I say as I move closer.

"Wait, rewind," he says as he holds his hands up. "You bailed me out?" He asks with furrowed eyebrows and I realise my mistake. "I don't understand you, Star. I don't understand why you would say this shit and the next minute you're paying my bail," he says.

"Harry, please don't make explain that. Look, I don't even know why I paid it but I did and I don't regret it, okay? But are you listening to me? I'm telling you that whatever we have, we can't act on it because Alex will kill you," I snap as I try to explain to him once again.

"Star, you need to understand that I don't care what Alex does to me anymore. Without you, life has no meaning-" he pleads as his hands hold mine in his. I feel the burning sting in my heart about how much he cares about me but I can't do the same because of Alex. I care so much that I'm willing to let him go.

"That's the thing, Harry. It can't work-" I try to speak but he cuts me off once again. I can sense the burning anger behind his words.

"I tell you what? Fine, be like that, Starlette," he snaps as he rises from the couch. "F*cken be a coward and run like you always do. I'm willing to throw everything away to be there for you but you aren't willing to do the same," he shouts as he clenches his jaw and tightens his fists into balls.

"Harry-"

"I'm so done with you. You're always running away and I'm always left chasing you. I'm better than that—I deserve better than that. I deserve someone who reciprocates the feelings and makes me feel like I'm good enough. Now get the f*ck out, Starlette," he snaps as he rips the door open for me.

"No, you have to listen to me-"

"I don't have to listen to you," he snarls.

"I didn't mean those words at the tree house. I needed to break whatever we had!" I plead as my hands grab his shoulders. I needed to break through and make him understand. I had to make him understand somehow.

"Save your explanation, Starlette. If you're good at saying all these harsh words, what makes me thing you won't do it again?" He says as he roll his eyes. I see the frustration with his actions and I know I messed up bad.

So I do the only thing I know—I walk away. I turn my back without another thought and walk straight through the door. I knew better to keep begging him to listen so I had to walk away to let him come to his senses. I refuse to believe he has given up on me already.

With the crashing of an object, my head snaps back to see Harry throwing a lamp on the wall. My eyes widen as I see the pieces shatter all over the floor and he falls onto his knees. With his back facing me and with the heavy breathing, I realise he's crying—like bad.

I couldn't go back to him though. No matter the urge to come crawling back, he needed a break from me. He needed to breathe. No matter how much I dread not turning back, I walk away to my best friends that happen to be in the van waiting for me once again.

Turning the corner, I see the van with Aurelia and Josh in the front and Ryder in the back. I slide in beside Ryder and release a breath I realise I'm holding since I got back. "Where were you?" Ryder asks as he glances at me from his phone.

"Threatening Harry," I simply state as I lean back onto the chair and look outside. As I stare at the building in front of me, flashes of Harry on his knees cross my eyes again. No matter how much I dreaded this, I knew better than to stay and hurt him even more.

I had to let go...for now

(Hey lovelies! What'd you think?)

~Love, Natalie