broken boy ❀ stiles stilinski

Insanity

Stiles P.O.V

Two weeks have passed since I had any sort of contact with any of them. The guilt was slowly eating away my sanity and that was what hurt me the most. It felt like people had given away any hope of me and just left me to die alone.

I had received many voice mails but I don't even care to open them, not wanting to hear their voices. Because just with hearing them, it reminds me even more of what happened in the past, and that was enough pain that I could barely handle.

I still have nightmares, horrible ones which would wake me up on the middle of the night. But then I notice that I'm not really awake. It was a dream, within a dream.

Each night the nightmares would get more darker and more real. They would sometimes surprise me in the day like hallucinations. The night before was definitely the worst one until now.

----------

I found myself at the school at night. Like many times now in my dreams.

I was walking through the hallways trying to find a way out which was impossible, which made me feel like something was definitely off.

I continued walking through the dark hallway holding onto the lockers as anything wrong could happen. I was waiting for the worst.

It was like the more I got near an exit, the more I was getting away from it.

Suddenly I felt the presence of someone behind me and when I saw him standing there with an evil smirk on his face my heart sank and I felt a wave of pain hit my chest.

''Hey. Did you miss me?''

I was in so much pain to even come back at him with words. It felt like the air was slowly being taken away from me. And I would end up suffocating to death.

I still felt all the guilt for every person that I killed, I couldn't look straight at his face. Even if he was covered up by all those bandages.

''Hey. Look at me.''

I didn't want to remember that horrible monster that made me have those horrifying nightmares which kept me awake for days. And the one who was eating from my pain which made me weaker at every second and almost killed me.

''Look at me!!''

Until that point I hadn't notice that I was sweating and trembling. I slowly looked up at him who was more closer than I initially thought.

'Do you miss my company, Stiles?'

'N-n-no' My voice betrays me as I was trying to act strong.

'Why don't you just admit the truth?' His raspy voice echoes through the hallway.

'W-what tr-truth?' I stutter.

'That you miss being under control, not being the weak foolish human on a pack full of supernatural creatures.'

'I-i...' He wasn't wrong.

I had to admit that I kinda liked being under his control seeing a life slip away by my hands- No. What am I talking about? He is just playing with me.

'I d-don't kn-know' I can't let him win.

'What is it that you don't know? Stiles.'

'If i like you taking control over me!' I basically screamed, overwhelmed by his terrifying presence.

'Let's take it slow, okay? What about i show you a little bit of what i can make you do.'

Then he disappeared. Suddenly the lockers at my side where full with blood and I felt something or someone on the floor and something on my hands. My curiosity was growing but at the same time I feared of what I would see if I look down. Then a voice started ringing in my head..

'Look down Stiles, there's something down there that I wanna show you.' I didn't look. I refused to do so.

'Look down!' He screamed making me flinch.

His voice was getting louder that I looked down and saw something that terrified me.

On the floor was Kira with slashes on her body and a pool of blood beneath her. And in my hand I was holding her katana which was covered in blood. I slowly stepped back throwing the katana away and getting away from that scene I just saw.

Then I started hearing screams in my head like people dying. They got louder and louder and the world around me started getting blurry. I tried to keep my balance but I fell to the ground and facing the floor with my eyes closed and with my hands on my ears.

When I finally looked up I wasn't on the school anymore, I was in my room. And I was sitting on a corner. But I noticed something across the room.

When I got near it was the katana. I took a step back and almost got a panic attack. But suddenly I woke up and I was on my bed. I was sweating so much and freezing.

As each day passed I felt anger flowing for an unknown reason. I started having desires of taking someone's life away. I didn't want to feel like this but sometimes it made me feel better.

All this was eating my sanity away.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••