January 18th, 2022 11:21 a.m
Question: Is it always my fault if something upsets me?
I had an friend (not anymore lol I dropped her so fast after this😭) say that she missed the old me.
It was somewhat triggering because I honestly hate the person I used to be.
I had so many outbursts and would lash out, I was honestly really angry and held it all to myself. It seemed like everyone upset me all the time when in reality, I js bottled everything up until the pressure was too much.
I used to fight with my dad a lot, and my biological father rarely called, which is why I have abandonment issues now. I hated talking to my mom about things because deep down I blamed her for my relationship with my dad going to shit.
I don't miss the old me, the old me was always upset and angry, js really good at hiding it until the pressure was too much. Even then, she never saw that because it was only people in my household who had to deal with it.
Saying the old me is missed is like a fuckin slap in the face to all the progress I've made. I'm pretty damn happy with all my progress and it's insulting to say basically the old me was better.
So my question remains, Is it always my fault if something upsets me?
~J
