It isn't that overwhelming. It turns out I just do it out of nature.
A year ago, I really planned and looked forward to applying to schools. But when I started to actually apply, I didn't feel the "this is it" moment. That I was a step closer.
A year ago, I thought I would always be on top of our class. A school year after, I learned that I wasn't the smart one.
A month ago, I couldn't imagine being on unwell terms with the friends I had. But fast forward to now, I've somehow lost a friend just because of a petty little story.
A week ago, I thought I have found the bestest set of friends. But later on, I found myself stuck in this somehow tiring friendship.
A day ago, I thought I'd feel all the jitters, all the butterflies, and all the goosebumps since I'd be graduating. However, it just feels bittersweet and nothing more.
A year ago I thought I was this, but now I'm just trying. I find myself looking back at times when things used to be this or used to be that. Maybe it's sinking in to me; that things will change ways for me. Or maybe it's a little less heavy for me to look back at how it was. I miss everything the way it was – but as humane as it sounds, we are prohibited from one thing: the choice of being constant. We always have to go on, move forward, and act like life, from a distant retrospective, is futile if we keep on going backwards.
But after all, we are immune to change and the hurt that comes with it. It comes with fulfilment, too. You find yourself in places you never thought you'll be in. And along the way, it will make you happy. It makes me happy.
Have a great day and live well everyone. All the love and best wishes I've got for you. ♥
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holding hands | p.sh
Fanfictionㅡ I held your hand not knowing someone already had the other, your past. "Until the next meteor shines. Tell me the moment it comes across us." ♡ ; enhypen's park sunghoon ©️ beautenha. (completed)
