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Baby Came Home 2 / Valentines - the NBHD
I laid beside Eren and panted. Both our chests seemed to rise and fall in synchronization, and that made me smile warmly. I wanted to cuddle him, but I mean... our bodies were sticky and the wet patch was uncomfortable between us.
We didn't speak for a long time, just breathed together and gazed at the ceiling.
"Eren, why did you and Floch get in a fight?" I asked.
Eren remained silent, and I wondered if he wasn't going to reply at all.
"I don't know, why did you invite a stranger to Jean's party?"
He had a point, but I still became defensive, "What do you mean! Can't I invite old friends!"
"You just said before we left Jean's that Floch's not even your friend."
I stuttered, "I- well- I did say that, yes, but what I meant was-"
"What you meant was you're a hypocrite." Eren laughed.
"Where is this coming from! Didn't we just enjoy ourselves, why are you trying to upset me?" I sat up and leaned on one elbow to glower at him.
Eren only gave me a glance, and what he did next upset me. He sighed and closed his eyes, like looking at me disappointed him.
"Why are you always ruining things?" He muttered to himself.
I didn't know how to respond, partially because I wasn't sure if he was muttering that to himself or to me. Either way, it didn't matter, because in the moment I decided that he meant I was ruining things.
I was ruining things?
"You know what, fuck you, and fuck this, and fuck everything, I'm going to- to Sasha for tonight." I said, holding back the urge to choke up and cry.
I didn't want Eren to see me vulnerable. In fact, I was saving my tears for when I arrived at his best friend's doorstep.
I rose from the bed in a fit, tossing the blanket off me, and I think this action alone made Eren open his eyes. He seemed almost regretful of what he said, or maybe I misinterpreted his expression. The moonlight always seemed to hide the blaze in his eyes, but I knew that if it were sunlight then I would see it.
"I can't fucking believe I wasted time with you, again." I grumbled, picking my clothes and pulling them on one-by-one.
To this Eren decided to speak up, "I- you said you wanted to!" He said.
"I guess I was mistaken!" I laughed, and I can't tell you how much these words struck him. His whole face seemed to hang like a ghost's.
At this point I started choking up, and I readied myself to leave before the dam holding back my tears broke.
"What I really wanted was..." I quavered, but I never finished my sentence.
"What I wanted..." I tried again, but nothing else came out my sore throat.
Eren was sitting propped on his shoulders. It pained me that, even in a situation like this, he appeared so beautiful. The way the moonlight cast shadows all over the contours of his chests made him look like a home light in the dark distance. I thought for a fleeting second that I could fall back into bed with him and cry into his chest, and feel a homely love wash itself over me.
But he would never be my home.
"Ah, Eren. You asshole..." I smiled, despite the tears burning their way down my cheeks. "You knew exactly what I wanted."
