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She's no longer in love with me. She loves him now.
Even with that knowledge, nothing stings as much as the three words she made sure I understood.
I. Hate. You.
Those three words have etched into my broken heart. Those three words are all I can hear. All I can think about.
All I can see is the look in her eyes. The broken look in her eyes.
I broke her.
I walk out of the bakery and Buck and Nilo are standing by the door. They look like they've seen a ghost.
"Go inside. Make sure she's okay." I order them.
They stand there shocked for a moment before nodding and heading inside.
I wipe my tears. I wipe and I wipe and I wipe. But they only seem to be multiplying.
I pull my hood over my head and walk over to the car. I get in and slam the door shut. I drop my head onto the wheel.
"Fuck!" I cry out.
She's married. She has a child. She's a mother.
My heart breaks as I imagine it. Her holding a little baby in her arms. I know for a fact she is the best mother in the world.
Seeing her again was like falling in love again. I knew I missed her. I felt it. Every second of the last two years all I felt was longing. But when I saw her, when I touched her I truly realized the depth of that longing.
My body, heart and soul pled to be near her. They begged for her mercy. For her touch. For her warmth. For her presence.
"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" I swipe my sleeves against my cheeks and start driving.
When I reach the mafia house, about 10 guards stand by the gate. Lucas walks up to the car, his hand on the gun that sits in his holster.
I put my window down. "Open the door, Lucas."
And again, I'm met with the ghost seen look.
Oh come the fuck on.
"Uh-Capo- I-I- I'll have to call the Don."
"Yeah do that. While you're at it open the god damn door."
Turns out I still have some sort of authority because he nods and opens the door. I drive my car in and park it. Quickly getting out and making my way in the house, I notice the small car toy that sits on the stair case.
I pick it up and have to swallow the lump that forms in my throat. Her kid. It's her kids toy.
I really thought that when I'd be talking about her kids, I'd also be talking about mine but life doesn't always turn out how you want it to.
