BSD ~ Soukoku ~ High school AU

31

,,Where did you learn to fight like this?"

He never knew such a simple question can ruin all the hopes again.

Dazai kept quiet for a while, thinking about what he should say. But then he decided that this is the best time to tell the whole truth. Now or never.

,,In the mafia."

The short ginger looked at him in surprise, not knowing if he should believe what he was saying. But the other one continued.

,,I did it so I could defend myself against those idiots, I never expected it to get this far. I did some small work for them in exchange for trainings. But then they wanted more than that. I should have expected that Mori will be expensive."

Chuuya already knew where is this whole thing getting. ,,You idiot why did you go to Mori?!"

Dazai pretend not to hear him and continued.

,,They ordered me to kill people. I didn't care. I was ok with it... until..."

,,Until?!"

,,Until I was ordered to kill you." He admitted, real sadness and despair mirroring in his eyes.

,,So you actually came to that roof top to kill me?"

No.

This can't be....

But then why did he take me with him now?

He could have just let me get arrested for the mass murder...

But would Mori let him go with just that?

Or he wanted to kill me that badly?

Why did I believe we can be at least friends?

,,no."

Chuuya just looked at him, both anger and confusion in his eyes.

,,I didn't intend to kill you at all. I just came to say goodbye."

Why is Dazai crying? What is this supposed to mean?

,,What are you talking about?" Chuuya didn't even yell anymore.

,,I was going to commit suicide. I came there so my last words will belong to you. I didn't want to die like your enemy."

Chuuya was completely stunned with shock.

Did he decide to kill himself so he doesn't have to kill me?

After a few seconds of staring, he gently took the other guy's hand. Just holding hands with the other calmed Dazai down so much. But Chuuya was on the edge of breaking down now.

,,I could have stopped that all... if I just was nicer. If we just didn't fight. Of if I had the determination to go talk to you before you made the deal..."

He felt a touch of Dazai's hand on his shoulder. ,,Stop blaming yourself. It won't change anything. We just have to make our way through this."

,,You're right." They made an eye contact for a while, getting lost in each other's eyes.

I missed this so much.

Thought Dazai to himself.

I missed looking into his eyes like this.

I missed his presence.

I missed the feeling that somebody is here with me.

I missed him.

Now I'll do anything to keep it like this.

~~~

They both were sitting on a roof of tall building, watching the city get darker and darker as the sun was setting.

,,What are we going to do now?" Chuuya asked.

,,I don't really know either. Whe have both police and the mafia against us now. I guess we have to throw away the lives we had until now."

It was sad. But Chuuya didn't feel like he has to give up on everything. Because he doesn't. Maybe he's never going to live his life the way he did until now, but he's not alone. And that fact gave him enough hope on it's own.

,,I think the safest option is to move to another country, best would be some small village where not too many people would mind us." Continued Dazai.

,,And what about our friends?" Chuuya remembered, how they had so much fun this holiday.

,,Don't worry. I'm more than sure that we'll meet them again."

Few minutes of silence continued, when suddenly Chuuya spoke. ,,Dazai?"

The other looked at him, their eyes meeting one more time.

,,I'm glad you're the one I have to go through all of this with."

Chuuya was thinking if he should really do it for a while, but after all he just couldn't resist and hugged Dazai. Despite how much he was scared that the other won't return his feelings.

Dazai was surprised, maybe even more than that. But he also knew that this is the best thing that could have happened. He returned Chuuya's hug and whispered in a soft voice ,,I think I had feelings for you from the very beginning."

Chuuya, who was just so scared of Dazai not returning his feelings, was so relieved. He loosened the hug just so he can give the other a small kiss on his lips.

This everything was so strange. But it also felt unbelievably right. And this is when they realised, that whatever happens, it can't be that bad after all.

,,I guess this is not a bad ending at all."

The end.

Fun fact- it wasn't supposed to turn out like this, I wanted to make a normal high school au, but well, ended up with deal with mafia and a mass murder...

Also thank u all for reading this. All the support means so much.

+ as I said, I'm gonna make another ff so I'll announce it here.

Also for some reason I'm really happy about finishing it. I literally forgot how much mental support writing random shit gives me.