EYE OF THE STORM | k.kazuha

20: OF LIFE AND DEATH

TW: Talks of death, Depression (?), Violence

It was another rainy night on Narukami Island. The thunder roared as lightning flashed in the dark skies. A mere moment of color in an otherwise empty canvas.

It was no longer a surprise to you if someone decided to strike during storms. Rain hindered your senses and silenced incoming footsteps, after all. If they wanted to kill you, storms were the perfect time to.

Every waking moment of your life, you feared the inevitable. Death.

Though you don't usually think about it, when it pops up, you can't help but feel despair. The fear of not knowing what's on the other side consumed you. You thought about how it would happen frequently. Would you feel any pain? Will it be peaceful?

You've gotten yourself into near-death situations so many times that you still wonder why the gods keep you alive. Why do they decide to not give up on you, even if you know you're not supposed to be here?

Usually, despite these thoughts, something in you kept you going. A fire was burning bright in your heart and it told you to live.

But that one night, in the pouring rain, it seemed the water seeped into your heart and extinguished the flame.

Four years. Four excruciating years.

It's been four years since you left the Nobushi. Four years since you got interrogated by some of the strongest in the group. Four years since you attacked the man who took you in, or in your opinion, manipulated you.

"You won't say your reasons for visiting the Tenryou commission? You're trying to sabotage us, huh kid? Answer me!" Takahito, your leader, angrily yelled.

You stayed silent, head facing the ground. You'd rather die than tell any sort of truth.

"Fine. Beat them up. I don't care how bad the damage is."

"But boss, Y/N's too important to our operations-"

"Don't make me repeat myself or you're next."'

You still remember the look on his face when you drew blood from his body, the anger evident in his eyes. It felt quite good, but the fear and realization dawned on you. Then, you ran as fast as you could. You ran until your legs couldn't anymore.

All you've been doing since then was run, fight, and hide. There was no such thing as a break in your vocabulary.

You were tired, and although not physically dead, you knew your soul was. You couldn't cry nor smile, that's how tired you were. Your world was deprived of color, life no longer had a bigger meaning.

The single thread you hung on to was the thought of Yui. How would she react if you died? You knew it wouldn't be pretty, and you couldn't dare die when she wasn't an adult yet. She was only 16. The age you left the Nobushi.

"Look who we have here!"

You didn't bother to look back.

"Any last words, Y/N? Takahito's still pretty mad about what you did you knowww~"

"It's been four years, and he's still mad? What a child."

"Even if you didn't almost kill your leader with that same sword, you'll never run away from us. Once a Nobushi, always a Nobushi."

"Come back, Y/N. I'm offering 'cause I'm nice. You were an important asset to us, after all."

You couldn't take the man's voice anymore. Standing up, blade unsheathed, you slashed the man's head in one fell swoop. It didn't feel good but nor did it feel terrible. You felt nothing killing that man, absolutely nothing.