𝐁𝐔𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐋𝐘[𝐥.𝐡𝐬𝐱𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫]──희승✓

Chapter 36- love & fear(✿)

"It may seems absurd but the truth is,... I got time traveled to the past, here. The person earlier is.....the me of present time."

_

"Look at your dates. You wrote year 2025."

"are you by any chance from future and time traveled to past?"

The thoughts hit you getting the hint of it; like pieces of jigsaw puzzle getting solved. A dry chuckle left your mouth. "You're joking right?" You watched him as he didn't response back or look at you. You felt your heart sink into your chest. "Heeseung-ah, tell me that you are." You reached out to him. You already knew it, you knew it by the way he looked; his eyes told it all.

Feeling of anxious grew up inside your chest. The thought pricked your eyes with unshed tears. With shaky inhale, you tried your best to bring your voice together. "I-I don't understand this. W-why? Is this even possible? I don't understand. Tell me. How can it be? I-I don't have an idea of it." You pressed your hands on your head. He looked down, unable to look into your eyes, his hands clenched into fists.

Before you would even realize, a drop of tear streamed down your cheeks. "I-I still can't believe it. All of this seems like a dream."

"Say y/n. Will you forgive me if I disappeared one day like those butterflies without saying goodbye?"

A thought of your life without him ran through your mind. It was him who made my life easier. Since I met him, my life got easier to live. It was him who helped me met them. If it wasn't for him, could I have been able to be friends with them like right now? If it wasn't for him, could I be alive right now? If he isn't here then..
A giant wave of sadness rushed into you. You remembered that one time when he just disappeared into nothing, even if it was for a blink of second, even if you were just imagining stuffs, you got gist of idea about it. You knew what was coming.

"Don't try to disappear." Your voice was barely audible. Your eyes drip with tears. Your walls, the walls that hold you up, make you strong just... collapse. Moment by moment, they fell. Salty drops fell from your chin. Yet again you cried in front of him but you didn't care whether you looked pathetic or pitiful. You let out your feelings. "W-will you stay by my side? W-will you promise me?" Your eyelashes fluttered with rapid attempts to blink away your tears, aggressively biting down your lower lips to refrain it from trembling. "If this moment passes, as though it hadn't happened, I'm scared you will disappear."

Finally, he looked up at you.

"I'm scared, scared I-I'll lose you. I-I don't to lose anyone anymore. So p-please.." His strong force pulled you into his arms as he hugged you tightly around you. A drop of single tear steamed down over his pale cheek. He hummed, "um. I heard you. I heard you so don't say anymore." His grip tighten as he rested his head over your shoulder. You should smell his aroma which weirdly comforted you. Your tears were streaming down your already wet cheeks dripped steadily into his shirt, drenching his shirt with your tears.

______

Now that the atmosphere calmed down, both of you were sitting down at narrow alley, dim light from far street light lit the dark space.
Your cheeks and nose turned rosy red after crying. Heeseung lean his back on the wall and looked up at the sky. "The sky is pretty." He said, getting no response back. He looked at you, "What do you want to ask?"

You pursed your lips before speaking. "How did you time traveled here? Why?" You looked straight into his eyes.
"I don't know either. Why? Before I knew it, I was already here." He looked at his fingers while playing with them.

"Then..." You tightened your hands into a fist, getting grip of your sweatshirt. He looked at you because of the pause there. "Are you staying here for long?"

He half-heartedly smiled before shaking his head 'no'. "Probably no." He placed his hand on his chest. "I can feel it that I don't have time."

You gulped down, the nervousness was back in your voice. "Then...will I be able to meet you in future?" You asked him, desperation evident in your eyes.

He paused for a while before smiling at her. "Of course we will meet in future. I will come running to you."

"Really?"

"Hm." He nodded.

"Promise?" You held your pinky finger up. You could see him hesitating for a while before grabbing your pinky finger with his with a smile. "Promise."

After parting the fingers away, you pulled your legs closer towards your chest. "Heeseung-ah, earlier, when you said that I would look at you differently if you tell me everything, I don't think it's true. Whatever you did in your past or future, I don't mind. After all, you are Heeseung that I know, and he is kind and nice." Your lips formed a genuine smile.

The summer breeze blew, softly brushing his raven hair. His eyes soften until sadness and pain filled his eyes again.

"will you still say that if I say I had done many terrible things? Beyond you can even imagine? I-"

You cut his sentence. "I don't care! Even if I don't know about what you did. I will trust you that I know and trust you. No matter what. You have me."

There was silence for a moment. His lips left a small giggle. His hand covered his face. Even in this dark, you could see light blush spread across his cheeks."I can't hold back anymore."

Yoou blinked few times in confusion.
He moved his face closer towards yours and your eyes widen and unknowingly backed off a little at his action. "I know you already drew line between us but I am crossing it now." He leaned even closer. Your already red face turned even hot red."Stop me if you don't want this."

He closed his eyes as he leaned in, slowly closing the gap between your and his lips. In response, you also closed your eyes. His soft lips came in contact with yours.
Under the stray night, two hearts felt the love for each other and fear. Fear to loss each other.

"And in that moment, I swear we were infinite."

___

The pale crescent moon shone like a silvery claw in the night sky. As the breeze was blowing, Heeseung has linked his hand with yours. Your hands were sweaty, feeling little embarrassed, you tried to slip your hands from his, but he grabbed it again. Little did you know, his face was light shade of red.

You broke the ice of silence. "Your face is bright red." You chuckled. Hitting the right point, his face heat up. "You're one to talk. You're also red." He said, you quickly covered your face. You could hear him giggle and you followed him.

The destination to your house ended. You were little disappointed when he part hands away. His lips creeped into a smile, he lifted his hand and patted your head gently. "You should go inside and sleep. I will see you tomorrow."

He was about to leave when you stopped him. "Um. Do you want to eat dinner together?"

He walked closer towards you, and you took a step back, hitting the door behind you. He rested his hand right beside you and bend down to reach your eye level. "I would love to. But I'm scared I won't be able to hold myself back." His low deep voice send you chills down your spinal cord, your face was bright red.

You quickly turned the knob of the door and involuntarily bowed to him. "G-good night!" You shouted, and slammed the door.

Your back rested on the door, you placed your hand on your chest, feeling the your heart pump faster. A mix of happiness and anxious creeped into your heart.

______________________________________

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