Kids

19. Grief is love persevering

After they parted for air, Mew rested his forehead on Gulf's.

"Don't ever say that Gulf. Emma and Jackson will feel sad.

They thanked you for being their friend, their family, didn't they?

They love you and the rest of the Kanawut Traipipattanapong family.

If they hadn't met you, they probably may not have been able to escape the harsh conditions of the orphanage. If they hadn't met you, they wouldn't have known how it feels to be able to trust and depend on someone else other than themselves. If they hadn't met you, they may not have known how it feels to be part of a family. If they hadn't met you, maybe Bright wouldn't be here.

So don't blame yourself.

Let me join you in that pain, walk with you, feel the same torture I know you bear. And I will be with you till the day you find freedom and peace of mind my love."

Gulf looked up and was met with sad puppy eyes. Mew's dark brown eyes were filled with concern, gentleness and love.

He chuckled softly.

Ah, he loves the man before him so freaking much.

Gulf nodded weakly, a smile lighting up across Mew's face.

He wants to open the front door and invite the emotional pain to leave. This way he is solid, real to himself and others, yet not wallowing but enabled to embrace his future free in a healthy way, reaching forward with confidence.

A future he sees Mew being part of, with himself and Bright.

Gulf wants to give Mew the love Mew deserves without being shackled by his struggles.

-----

The two lay on the bed in silence. Gulf nuzzled into Mew's chest, relaxed upon listening to Mew's heartbeat.

"After Emma and Jackson passed away, I went to handle the hospital papers. While I was gone, Bright was waiting with Beam. He was inconsolable.

And there, Bright met you for the first time."

Mew's eyebrows raised. He didn't remember meeting Bright when he was a toddler.

Gulf looked up and chuckled upon seeing Mew's clueless expression. "You were on medication at the time. So it is understandable if you do not remember.

You were sitting on one of the hospital chairs waiting for your IV drip to be done.

Bright sat in the row in front of you. You were unwell and could have scolded him for creating a ruckus.

But you did the far opposite from that.

You stood up from your seat and sat beside him. More like stumbled into the chair beside him.

The noise startled Bright. He was going to snap at you but he stopped.

He could see your tiredness. Your deep eyebags, your pale complexion, your sunken cheeks. Despite that, you still mustered your brightest smile for him.

Your eyes were so soft, filled with tender care. Something which further intrigued Bright. How could such depth of warmth be shown to a total stranger.

He didn't push you away when you laid his head on your lap. When you sang, he teared a little. Coincidentally, you sang the song Emma always sang to him before he slept. Or perhaps it wasn't a coincidence but fate instead.

Eventually, he fell asleep. When he woke up upon my return, you were no longer there. You had to go as the doctor called you.

He managed to know your name because Beam heard it when the doctor called for you.