off the table, jung sungchan ✓

(41) - what do you know about being the first?

第三年

September passed by in a haze. There weren't many details of the past months that were worthy enough to be noted. That guy and I still didn't talk; we were still distant. Lots of studying, gelato hunting with Changmin, Sunwoo visiting me in Seoul every once in a while, and the rest were just plain hassle for pre-suneung. 

Then, it was October again. 

Yongsan High's 47th birthday festival became the second vicinity Sungchan's father made his appearance. Jung Jaehyun was there too. Standing alone or together, the Jung looked extremely powerful seated on those VIP red couches, emitting an aura that explained what they're capable of.

The students were all still filling up the seats in the auditorium when my ears caught the gossip between the two girls, sitting in front of me.

"Woah, they never personally come here, this is such a rare sight!" The one with the pigtail gushed in excitement towards the girl next to her. "No wonder Sungchan looks so freaking good, the Jung genes are incredible."

The girl with shoulder-length hair whispered but still loud enough to be heard by me. "That's Sungchan's family?"

"Duh, of course. The biggest shareholder of Yongsan, it's literally their family."

The people around me momentarily shut up and it took me a few seconds to register the presence sitting down next to me. Damn, I really forgot that the seats in our auditorium were based on orders. And Sungchan just happened to be next to my order. Realizing our seating arrangements were making us quite a talking material, we both tried to shrug it off but the more students filed in, the more heads turned around to see us.

Just because the rumours months ago had resolved, that doesn't mean we were freed from being the talk of the town. Everyone seemed to be alerted that we were no longer in a talking term, that the damage to our friendship is beyond repairable. Especially when Lea, one of Winter's close friends became a reason for my drowning incident. 

Trying my best to shrug it off, I kept a straight face and pretended to keep myself busy with my phone.

I vividly notice Sungchan taking out his phone from his blazer from the corner of my eyes. He seemed to be typing something on his phone, and as expected, my phone buzzed.

jeongchan

Do I make you uncomfortable?

I can go somewhere else if you want

Btw, I'm sorry for talking to you

lovaera

im fine

if you leave, it's gonna make the rumours even worse

just stay still

jeongchan

Okay

Sungchan kept his promise very well this time. He never interacted even once with me and it's a good thing that he seemed to be very engrossed in studying for suneung after acing the pre-suneung test one week ago. 

When I decided to cut everything off, I was impulsive, I admitted that. But I have no regrets, I think. He hurts me. He wrecked me. He didn't trust me. He didn't show that he cared when I drowned. He's the only person I talked to about how much I feared the water, about Suyeon and how much I wanted to be a doctor— I entrusted him with my vulnerability and he took advantage of it.