Crash & Burn x Jemily

59

October 12th, 11:00 pm
Olivia has been home for a few days, and JJ and I are both exhausted.

No matter how tired I am, it kind of feels like the best feeling ever. I mean we're parents. We have an actual baby. It's crazy.

I think JJ's doing worse than me though. She wakes up every 2 hours to feed her. I asked if she wanted to try pumping so I could wake up and feed her, but she refused.

Right now we were laying in bed and I was trying to get JJ to sleep. Something funny I found was that everything I did to put Olivia to sleep, also but JJ to sleep.

If I read her a bed time story, JJ would be knocked out in minutes. Sing her a song? The next thing I knew JJ was passed out on my shoulder.

Pretty soon Olivia started to howl in her bassinet, and JJ quickly bolted awake again.

She got up, grabbing the baby from the bassinet and started to nurse her. "Oh shit." She muttered. "The bag... I left the thing in the.. thing."

"I need a little more context sweetheart." I brushed some hair out of her face. "The bag... it's still in the car." She was so sleep deprived I'm surprised she could even function.

"The grocery bag?" I asked her. She nodded, gently patting the baby's chest. "I'll go get it." I kissed her cheek.

She went to the store only a few hours ago, so hopefully nothing was spoiled. I went down to the car, grabbed the bag and brought it inside.

I put everything away before going back up to our room. I could already hear Olivia wailing loudly.

I walked inside and saw JJ rocking her back in forth, tears now streaming down her face.

"Jen? What's wrong baby?" I took Olivia into my arms, gently wiping the tears off JJ's face. "I fed her, I changed her diaper, she's not hot, she's not cold, I can't get her to sleep. She hates me. I'm failing as a mother." She sobbed.

Now JJ and Olivia we're both sobbing and I had to do my best to comfort them both at the same time. "She does not hate you Jennifer. She's a baby, they cry all the time for no reason. You're not failing, you're doing an amazing job."

I rubbed her back, trying to get Olivia to calm down a little as well. I sat there for almost 10 minutes, but neither of them stopped crying.

"Alright come on, come with me." I pulled JJ up, and carried Olivia downstairs. JJ furrowed her eyebrows as she stumbled her way to the front door.

"Where are we going? I don't have pants on." She looked down at the Nike shorts she was in. "That's fine. We're not going anywhere." I told her.

I took her hand and grabbed the car keys. I unlocked the door, strapping a still screaming Olivia into her car seat.

I got JJ buckled into the front and then started the car. "What are you doing?" JJ mumbled, tears still streaking her face.

"We're going to drive around a little." I said, as I backed out the car. JJ yawned, leaning her head against the window. It was very dark outside, nearly midnight. You could get a good look at the stars right now.

I drove with one hand and held JJ's hand with my other. "Relax. Close your eyes, try and fall asleep." I whispered to her. As I drove around the neighbourhood Olivia's crying slowed down. JJ's eyes were fluttering open and closed.

"You are my sunshine
my only sunshine,
You make me happy
When skies are grey."

I sang softly as I continued to drive. JJ sings this song every night to Olivia when she tries to get her to go to sleep.

"You'll never know dear
How much I love you,
Please don't take
My sunshine away."

I looked at JJ, and I had successfully gotten her to fall asleep. I gently kissed her fingers before setting her hand down.

I looked back at Olivia, who was silent. She was still wide awake though. Her big blue eyes were wandering around the car.

I looked back at her. "You really tire your mom out. You know that?" I shook my head, laughing to myself.

She stared at me curiously and cooed softly. "You are awfully cute though, so I think she lets it slide. We both love you a lot."

She stuck her tongue out at me, her eyes widening. "It's very late. You should really be going to sleep." I scolded her.

She stuck her tongue out at me again and I continued to drive. After 3 more rounds around the block the baby had finally fallen asleep.

I drove us home, pulling into the garage. I was in a bit of a dilemma right now because there's no way I was waking anyone up, but I also couldn't let them sleep in the car.

I figured I'd had to use my super human strength. First I unbuckled JJ, lifting her out of the car and resting her against my shoulder. Olivia was a little tricker.

I managed to unbuckle car seat and slide her out into my other arm. I kicked the car door shut, and locked the car.

I went inside, somehow managing to lock the front door without dropping my keys.

I silently walked upstairs, my back starting to hurt from the awkward position. I finally made it to the bedroom though.

I laid JJ down, before carefully setting Olivia down in the bassinet. I kissed her head gently. "Sweet dreams baby." I whispered to her.

I climbed into bed next to JJ, pulling the covers over both of us. I ran my hand along her cheek, leaning down and kissing her forehead. "Sweet dreams to my other beautiful girl." I smiled. I laid down, letting JJ rest on my chest. I couldn't take my eyes off of either one of them.

My perfect little family.