𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑹𝑶𝒀𝑨𝑳(18)

New Me

Beep, beep, beep, bee ,-

I slam the alarm clock for the fifth time of getting up everyday, now I know why Americans get so upset about Monday's. The start of going to school or going to work and doing the same thing all the time, almost sounds like prison. Monday's are supposed to be the start of something great and new, instead it brings the start of the same old , same old. Same penthouse, same rules, same me. With a sigh I get up out of bed and trudge to my beautiful bathroom to brush my teeth. While I brush my teeth a little yellow note grasps my attention.

Good Morning! I left some waffles and eggs and bacon for you on the counter,

Like always.

And I brought you more cherries, your welcome. Me and Azeil will be out today for like 5 minutes so don't do anything stupid!!!. K love you bye.

- Lottie

I wipe my mouth from the toothpaste residue after spitting it out. I head straight over to the kitchen to feed a hungry mouth. Even the breakfast is the same. Lottie and Azeil told me not to do anything stupid which obviously meant not to leave this pretty prison. But honestly I can't stay I'm here much longer and I need to go outside and actually touch the street ; not just look at it.

And maybe I want to be bad and do something wrong.

I haven't had fun in..., well you could really say ever. I finish the last piece of cheesy scrambled egg and put my dirty plate in the sink.

I'm making the executive decision and going out and having fun for once in my life. And contributing to that I'm going to do all the things that were considered 'bad' things to do, starting today. Walking into my neat closet I start rummaging for clothes I could wear out today. I could mostly only find dresses hanging up. Most of the drawers were empty except the ones that had shirts and jeans in them separately.

I put on a appropriate casual outfit for today. Hesitantly I put on mascara and lip gloss. My palms gorw more sweaty the more I start thinking about actually going out. Maybe I'm overthinking and maybe there's a possibility that Ace isn't actually in New York. And maybe, just maybe, all of this will be over soon enough for me to go back home.

As I reach for the front door precautious thoughts swarm my head while my hand is still inching forward. What would happen to me if Lottie and Azeil found out I was gone? Would they tell Blythe?. Maybe he would see that I'm untrustworthy by myself and drag me back to Elopia.

I open the door with still cautious thoughts in my head. I become face to face with the metal door again and my anxiety starts to grow. Thoughts of my previous encounter with the elevator make me want to sprint back in my room for protection.

A little peice of me just wants to leave and have fun and forget about everything and be bad for once. I take a deep breath trying to shove away the anxiety. I step inside the elevator and press the L button meaning for Lobby. As the doors close I immediately regret going in and my anxiety spikes through the roof. I hold on to the railings inside of the elevator for dear life for help. I squeeze my eyes shut as I feel the weird sensation of moving in the elevator.

The only thoughts that are present in my mind is repeatedly scolding myself for not taking the stairs. I'm feeling unbelievably scared that I want to cry.

This is all for a good cause, this is all for a good cause.

The positive affirmations don't seem to calm me at all, only when the elevator stops and dings when the doors open. I quickly get out of it onto motionless land, a sigh leaves my mouth. I wipe my wet hands on my jeans and try to collect myself again.