A Handful of Daffodils (Forgotten Series, #7)

Chapter Seventy-Three

Two weeks later

"Placenta and amniotic sack look good. Baby is measuring up perfectly for twenty-two weeks." Amber adjusted the ultrasound wand on my belly. "I know we did the big scan last week but everything is still where it should be, in fact I want to say she is in the top percentile for growth, which we are lucky to see." Amber moved the wand and I listened to the steady whooshing that represented my daughter's heartbeat, a small smile on my face as I watched the image on the screen. "It makes me feel more secure in our timeline of thirty-six weeks. With her measuring up so well, and if it continues, we know she will be more than prepared for the early delivery, especially with giving you the steroid shots."

The words washed over me, along with a touch of anxiety. We had talked about it extensively but the thought of needing to take her out before she was due was still scary for me. I wanted her to be where she was safe and where she would keep growing but I also knew it was what was safest. I traced the little face outline I could see with my eyes and I had the sudden urge to cry.

I sniffled, trying to force everything back down. There was no need to cry but Amber gave a small aww. "It will be okay, Menza." Her voice was comforting and that just made the tears that much worse and my bottom lip trembled as I struggled to hold them back. She pulled the ultrasound wand away, putting it back on the machine. "She's going to be born healthy and with no issues. I know you want to keep her inside until her due date but she will be okay at thirty-six weeks." I nodded before bursting into tears. I covered my face with my hands, feeling so embarrassed. I was seeming to cry at the drop of a hat and I didn't like the feeling but I couldn't control it.

Amber grasped my shoulder and I sniffled, trying to stifle the sobs. "We are already prepping the infirmary for the worst case scenario, the Hunters are going to provide a neonatal cot along with all the hardware. It will arrive when you're at twenty-six weeks just to be on the safe side." I wiped at my eyes before blinking rapidly and nodding. I knew it was the right thing to do and that everything would be okay. I knew that. "Andrew is even putting his studies on hold for the moment to get a crash course in neonatal care and midwife-ry so he can be an extra support person. We also have several nurses that will be coming the day before we induce you. We have a whole team to make sure it will go perfectly." I nodded again but my bottom lip kept trembling.

"I know." I croaked it out and she handed me a tissue that I used to wipe at my face. "I'm just crying all the time." It took all I had not to burst into tears all over again. I was so emotional and I hated it. I couldn't control my emotions and I spent a lot of time crying over the silliest of things.

She chuckled. "I know the feeling. When I was pregnant with my little Lula, I was a mess at the same stage." She leaned over me, catching my gaze with her blue eyes. "You are growing an entire human being right now and that takes a lot out of you physically and your hormones are surging and all over the place. We can forgive ourselves some tears."

I knew what she was saying but it didn't stop the new surge of tears. "I just really want her to stay where she's safe." I wanted her to stay inside me until she was ready to come out, not before that. I didn't want to have to prepare for her being too little and her being sick because of it. I didn't want to have to think about neonatal care and having them prepare for the very worst. I wanted her to be okay, for the pregnancy to be normal.

"I know and I would prefer her be in you until she's due as well but it's safer for her not to be." Amber's voice was low and soothing and I hated that I was the reason there was no safety for my daughter, that she had to come out early.

"I feel like a bad person!" I bawled it out, bursting into tears all over again. I was the reason she couldn't stay inside me. I made the deal with Mene and it was such a selfish thing to do. It was different when I couldn't feel her move, hear her heartbeat, or see pictures of her. I thought it only affected me but now it didn't and my poor innocent little female had to bear the consequences of it.