𝐁𝐔𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐓 • 𝐄.𝐃

fourteen

kailyns pov

"what do you mean she's gone?" i asked even though i was pretty sure i knew what he meant. i just didn't want it to be true.

"she's not coming back." my dad broke down as he went upstairs into his room.

i couldn't hold it in. i broke down as well, feeling ethan's arms wrap around me. he kissed the top of my head as i cried into his shoulder.

"i am so sorry." he mumbled into my head.

"i-it's not y-our fault." i sat up and put my head in my hands.

i finally looked at ethan who was leaned back on the couch. he stared at the ground and i could see a look of guilt in his eyes as a couple tears fell. i was confused why he looked so guilty.

"you knew didn't you?" my question caused ethan's eyes to connect with mine then avert back to the floor.

"you fucking knew my mom was in the hospital dying and you didn't tell me??" i stood up and looked at him in anger.

"could you at least hear me out before you get angry?" he begged with so much guilt held in his eyes. i felt bad and sat back down.

"it's too late, im already angry. but still tell me please." i lowered my voice as he sighed.

"i came by yesterday to see you because i didn't know about your mission. i came in and your mom was standing at the counter and she looked extremely sick. she told me that you and your dad weren't home but i was more worried about her. i asked if she was okay but when she tried to wave me off, she lost balance. i ran to her side where she tried to tell me again that she was fine but she fell to the floor. i called 911 and followed them to the hospital. i sat there for an hour waiting to here back from the doctors. while i was waiting i was debating on whether to call you or your dad. i so badly wanted to let you guys know that she was in the hospital but i didn't want to distract you guys. i knew if i distracted you guys, one of you could've gotten hurt and i didn't want that. a doctor came out and told me she was in ICU and the cancer had really taken over. there was a low chance of saving her but they were doing everything they could. i came by this morning to let you guys know but you were sleeping. your dad asked me to not tell you. he said he didn't want to put that stress on top of the stress you got from the mission and the fact that you just grew close with your mom again. i am so sorry kailyn." tears continued falling down his cheeks as he waited for my reaction.

"get out." i choked out, my words being barely audible.

"w-what??" i could see him slowly breaking by looking in his eyes. i stood up and looked down at him.

"a fucking promise with my dad is more important than me knowing my mom is dying??" i yelled at him. i watched the guilt come right back to him.

"i can't even look at you right now." i turned away and went upstairs. i closed my door, hearing the front door slam soon after.

i laid in my bed, staring at the ceiling. my phone buzzed on my night stand. i grabbed it seeing a message from ethan.

ethan: i know you're mad right now. i understand. whenever you're ready to talk, i'll be waiting.

i threw my phone down onto my bed. the longer i thought about it, the more i realized how stupid i'm being. i really can't be mad at him right now.

im keeping a very similar secret from him.