Her Mind

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Max is not one to cooperate well, sure she's gotten better but as far as Lucas is concerned, she's not going anywhere by herself for the next few weeks. And as far as Max is concerned, she needs to clear her mind. Now that she is finally (being forced to) take a break, the stress of her situation has sunk into her mind. It only takes 24 hours for it to become a problem.

She was tossing and turning in her sleep, feeling hot and then shivering. She sat up in her bed sweat beating on her forehead. She did not like it one bit, she knew she was sick but how? She wasn't exposed to anyone that was currently sick at the moment. She wondered as she looked at the alarm clock on the desk in the room.

"ugh" Max scoffed, "4 am and I'm stuck in this not-so-comfy situation." she finished. Max wanted to go wake Lucas up but she knew that her ankle was sore still and it would be inconvenient to walk. So she did the second most logical thing her mind could think of at this ungodly hour. Try to sleep and wait until the morning for Lucas to check on her. 

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The bedroom door opened and Lucas came out of the hallway, he did his best to come into the room quietly but Max was lightly sleeping due to her current situation. She sat up and made room for him to sit on the edge of her bed.

"Max, you okay? you look..." He started.

"awful? yeah, I know. I woke up at four because I somehow became sick. So if you would ever be so kind as get me some medicine and call El, she knows a thing or two about medical situations." Max gave him a small smile as he nodded and began to walk out of the room.

"I'm assuming you want some of my mom's pancakes as well? Maybe some fruit on the side, might not help you with being sick but I know it will help your hunger." He smiled back at her. 

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A/N: If you don't know already, stress and work overload can actually cause some people to get sick or get some sort of rash or hives. I've decided to write this into the story to show a little perspective on Max's mental health. 

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With the return of Lucas, Max once again sat up and took the glass of water along with some Advil he had bestowed upon her. She took the medicine and then set the glass of water on the side table next to her bed. Lucas had placed a plate with pancakes and a mixed assortment of fruit ranging from strawberries and grapes to watermelon and cantaloupe. 

"How did you even get sick in the first place?" Lucas asked his girlfriend as he sat down on the edge of the bed.

"I don't know. That's why I asked you to call El, she took classes on this type of stuff." She huffed while taking a few pieces of fruit off the plate. 

"Well, she told me that she'll be here in 10, so that was like 7 minutes ago? Besides that, is there anything I can do for you?" Lucas kindly asked.

Max took a second to think. To be honest with herself, all she wanted was to be cared for. Although with her being Max, that was simply stupid. She wouldn't admit it with all her stubbornness. She sighed.

"If you could bring me more water that would be good, besides that, I don't know maybe check in on me every so often." Max looked at Lucas and smiled.

"Alright, that works for me. I'm going to go get you some more water and wait for El." Max responded with a faint "thanks" as he started to walk back out of the room and downstairs.

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Max laid back down trying to collect her thoughts. She went back to the days when Neil would abuse Billy and her, she went back to when he finally got what he deserved. She went back to her days in middle and high school, she felt defeated. Her mind felt like it was spinning out of control. It was pure panic, she hated it. Max tried to take deep breaths to calm herself but couldn't. She felt the urge to grasp her neck. She felt a warm sensation grab her by the shoulders.

"Max! MAX!" It yelled.

She got herself out of the trance and found herself being shaken by El. She was relieved, Max didn't realize that her breathing finally steadied. She looked up to El who had a face of sheer panic. She finally breathed out and looked at the redhead, she sat on the bed.

"Now I know why you are sick, you clearly have stress overload. And look at you! You clearly have so much stuff going on up there in your mind. Max, you need to clear your head of these thoughts in order to help you." El took a breath and looked at Max. "You need to tell me what is going on up there Max." She finished.

Max only nodded, she took a shaky breath and began to speak. El knew about the few things Max told her back at the hotel in California, but she didn't know about the other things. Max was never open about her life all that much. So for Max to open up about what was going on in her mind, it would be a tough task she had to work through. 

"Everything. El, everything. The media, the attention, Lucas and I. The past memories of Neil and Billy. It just gets worse, I don't know what to do so I just don't say anything and all of it just sorta builds up. I know it's not healthy but I have no idea how to not think about all of it." Max could feel her face get warm as a few tears ran down from her eyes.

El didn't expect her to be this open but she didn't mind it, she was her best friend and they could trust each other with their lives. El thought about what to say for a moment and then spoke again.

"Well is there anything that helps keep the bad memories and thoughts away?" 

Max didn't want to admit to the answer but it was El and she already knew. Plus she said to be honest or else it (meaning El's help) wasn't going to work. Max nodded to her which made El smile knowing that there was something that helps her dear friend.

"Okay. Well, what is it?"

She hesitated. "Lucas. Whenever he hugs me or reassures me. Like if it's just him squeezing my hand or me resting on his shoulder." Her face was a little tinted with the color red. El smiled at the fact it was Lucas, she knew one thing. Lucas and Max both loved each other, it was so obvious to the fact if she wondered Dustin and Mike were dumb enough not to see it. 

She was happy to know that Max was working her feelings out, even though she and Lucas have intentions of "taking it slow". El knows that they both are cautious about it, but she hates seeing them have awkward interactions when they clearly know what each other wants.

"Okay, that's good!... Now that you told me, do feel better? Like a weight has lifted off your chest?" El still asked her, knowing the probable answer already but she wanted to be sure. Max nodded which made El smile at her.

"Good. Now, all you need to do now is take a break every now and then. It should really help your mental health and it will help make you not feel so tired and moody all the time. That's all, also be around Lucas more. I'm sure he won't mind it" El told her in a teasing tone of voice, much to Max's dislike. 

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Wow, that was a lot, a little longer chapter but it's good.

Until next time,

- Macy

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