Delta [Epsilon #2]

Chapter Forty-Four

Kyra

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I fumbled the paper between my fingers, finding it difficult to make straight folds through its coarse texture. I worked by memory, trying to ignore the incessant chant blaring at the back of my mind -- idiot, idiot, idiot.

I didn't know why I was doing this -- fighting to keep the thick piece of paper in place as I folded it. Well, actually, I did know why, but I was too proud to think the answer out loud in my head. Also because, if I strung the thought together, I would realize just how stupid it sounded. 

Idiot. 

Once the paper resembled something of a bird, I held it up to the light of my desk. It wasn't my best work, but it had been a year since I'd made a paper crane. The last time was back in the human world, for some school project I couldn't recall. So why now, among fanged beasts who shredded flesh and wreaked havoc for fun, would I be making origami?

Simple -- an apology gift. 

Idiot.

I dropped the crane and pressed my palms to my forehead. It was stupid. I knew it was, but the guilt had been eating away at me for days now, not the mention the radio silence. Every training session felt like a competition of who would suffocate first, of which I was the only participant. Faelen had been mad at me before, but this was different. This was silence, something much harder to bear. But what could I, Kyra Aetos, possibly offer a seven-hundred-year-old werewolf who'd spent most his centuries brooding and killing? After all, I had given him everything I could -- apologies, offers of atonement, and yet nothing seemed good enough. No matter how many times I apologized, no matter how many times I looked him in the eyes and told him how much I wished I could go back and do things differently, he didn't want to hear it.

So whatever would some piece of paper do?

Idiot! That voice hissed again, but I tuned it out with the screech of my chair. With a glare, I swiped the paper crane and stared at it. Part of me debated tossing it into the fire, but the little bent angle of its beak resonated with something deeper inside me, and suddenly the thought of tossing it into the fire felt akin to tossing a puppy. 

I shook my head. Hell, what was I even thinking? Faelen would laugh me out the court for this one. Angrily, I shoved it in my pocket and made my way to the door. Best hope it got destroyed in today's session. 

Not that we'd be doing much. 

I made my way down the halls without so much as a word to anyone. I'd strayed from breakfast these last few days, but aside from the food, it didn't have much to offer socially. Azure had cut ties with Raina, and Luc had fallen off the face of the Earth. I really didn't want to deal with Raina -- assuming she hadn't flunked out like I had -- so I'd opted to stay in my room instead.

And think. Thinking was torturous. 

When I finally made it outside, the sun cut like a dagger into my retinas. Grass crunched underfoot as I started across the grounds, towards the small cabin I'd become so familiar with. Beside it, a dark figure, arms crossed over his chest as he waited for me. Even from a distance, I could see the bandage peeking out from under his shirt, as well as the little band-aids scattered along his arms. Fortunately, his swelling had gone down. By all counts and purposes, he'd made a speedy recover.

When I got within ear-shot, however, I heard the silent wince that accompanied his step. My heart dropped. Speedily he may have recovered, but not all the way. Not even three days of powerful Delta healing had been enough to fix his body entirely. I swallowed my pang of guilt.