Chapter Thirty Four

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Kingsley was going to swear off of alcohol.

Even after a day, he felt dizzy, and the heaviness in his head hadn't decreased a bit. He was still at Roan's apartment, he was about to leave the night before, but seeing the state that he was in— the husbands didn't let him.

Kingsley had no clue what the next step would be. Was he supposed to go to work and pretend that nothing ever happened between him and Lorenzo? Was he supposed to put up a façade once again? Was Lorenzo going to do the same? The thought of Lorenzo acting like the two of them were nothing but colleagues sent a sharp pain in Kingsley's chest. He couldn't go back to being just that, not anymore. 

He wanted to talk to him, to sort out their problems but he didn't know what to say. Lorenzo had so clearly stated that he wanted to stop whatever was going on between them, and for a valid reason that Kingsley couldn't even blame him for. That didn't mean that it didn't hurt, though. He wasn't mad at Lorenzo for wanting to put a stop to them being together, he understood where the man was coming from. The last thing Kingsley wanted was for Lorenzo to get fired.

But the thing that made him angry was when Lorenzo said Kingsley didn't know what it was like to work hard for something. Kingsley was aware that he was extremely privileged, but that did not mean he sat on his ass all day. He had been working an entry-level job for a year, not because he had to, but because he wanted to. And that counted. He was more than what was in his or his parents' bank balance.  And he was still hurt by Lorenzo belittling him like that.

Kingsley didn't have the strength nor the motivation to get out of bed. He stayed in there until Kai got back from work. All Kingsley did was stare at the walls or the ceiling and blame himself for breaking the one rule that he had. For getting attached to a man after what had happened with his ex. For years, he had stayed behind his walls with his guard up, and the one time he didn't... Well, not like it mattered anymore. It was too late.

He was right. Everything ends. And he was heartbroken all over again. Kingsley didn't even know how or when his feelings for Lorenzo grew so strong. All he wanted was to just sleep with him. No strings attached whatsoever. But now there he was... lying in bed, depressed, wondering how he was going to pull himself out of this pit that he had dug with his own two hands.

"Kingsley?" Kai called out as he opened the door after knocking twice. Kingsley just grunted in response. "Have you eaten anything?"

"No," Kingsley muttered.

"Dude, come on," Kai frowned. "You haven't eaten in... almost two days now. And you usually devour our fridge when you stay over."

"I'm not hungry," Kingsley replied. He knew he was acting bratty, but he couldn't care less about that.

"Alright, time to stop being a little bitch," Kai said sternly as he folded his arms in front of his chest. "I'll make you some grilled cheese sandwiches, okay? And you're going to eat them."

"Or what?"

"Or I'm going to tell Roan that you were the one that spilled wine over his favorite shirt last new year," Kai threatened.

"How did you— alright, I'm getting up," Kingsley sighed.

"And take a shower, please? You stink," Kai said, scrunching up his nose.

Kingsley sat up on the bed, and he raised his arm to smell himself, gagging as he realized that Kai was right. Kingsley had to pull himself together, he wasn't the type to go into a shell or be a mess. He was strong, the kind to stand tall even in the face of heartbreak. So, then why did he not feel strong? Why did he feel like nothing mattered anymore? Kingsley hated himself for having such thoughts, for being a drama queen. But he simply couldn't help it.

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