Cake One Shots

Iris

Iris

A fake smile spread across his face. He sang the lyrics to his songs, eyes scanning the sold out arena. It was a sea of faces, all who seemed to be having the best day of their lives as they swayed and danced to the music. Texas wasn't a joke, that was for sure because he couldn't even see where the people ended in the far back.

He remembered when there was a time that he would have killed to be where he was now. To be singing with his two best mates in front of one of the biggest crowds yet, but he still couldn't manage to properly smile.

How could he smile when he felt like he was dying from within? No, not dying but dead? If you looked at a picture of Luke five years ago you would see how bright his eyes were, how the blue just seemed to go on forever. But now he physically flinched every time he saw himself in the mirror now, the blue had long since dimmed over to a stale ugly shade of blue, almost grey.

"Thank you." He softly whispered into the mic, looking down at his feet. His thumb carefully traced over his pinky ring and a sense of sadness circulated through him.

He shook it off and plastered that fake smile again, hoping that no one caught his little trip up. He walked to the center of the stage, and with his two best mates, they bowed. He threw his pick into the crowd and with one last wave, he exited off the stage.

When they all got back onto the tour bus he headed straight for the bunks. Stripping down to his boxers, he placed his clothes on top of the extra bunk. Droplets of water rolled down his back, his hair still wet from the shower he took back at the arena.

He laid on his top bunk, his knees curled into his chest. A couple of years ago his pillow would have been damp with tears but now he would do anything to cry again, to vent out his emotions, because how was it possible to love somebody so much?

He could see it so vividly still that sometimes it shocked him to his core. He can still see the way those brown eyes would light up with happiness and make butterflies erupt in his stomach. The images were oh so crystal clear and he doesn't know if he'll ever be able to forget them, not like he would ever want to.

But what was probably the most haunting thing was the way the life left those puppy brown eyes. As the blood pooled around his head, matting his hair and staining the street. The way it felt to feel his heart stop beating beneath his fingers. That was a feeling that would never leave him, that will haunt him for the rest of his life.

His body shook with dry sobs just like all the other nights. He tried so hard to forget Calum in the past four years but his mind wouldn't simply let him. He was so tired of it all that sometimes he wished he could just end it all.

**
Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight
**

"M'gonna go get some coffee." He mumbled at the boys who were on the couch watching whatever show.

"Have fun." Ashton muttered, not bothering to take his eyes off the screen.

He grabbed his wallet and phone, shoving them in his sweat pants. Taking a cab to downtown LA, he told the driver to take him to whichever coffee shop.

He handed the driver a twenty and stepped out onto the sidewalk. The coffee shop was small, that was the first thing he noticed as he entered. It had a homey feel to it, he could see small traces of Australia in there and he swears there's little pieces of London too.

It was empty at the moment but he could imagine people just lounging on the chairs drinking coffee while reading a book or chatting quietly with friends. He read the menu and decided on his drinks after five minutes of serious thinking.