Losing my Head (Hunger Games Fanfic)

Deep Underground

I apologize for not updating in a while, I needed some motivation.

Anyway, the fic is almost over! I suspect maybe at the most, three chapters to go after this.
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There was a story I enjoyed when I was smaller. It was about a small fish that swam in the ocean. One day, the fish had found a clam at the bottom of the ocean. He knew that eventually, a pearl would appear when the clam opened. The fish wanted the pearl so bad, he carried the clam everywhere he went. Eventually, the other sea animals wanted the clam. The fish was harassed and chased for the clam, but he wouldn't give it up.

When the clam finally opened, the excited fish received nothing but disappointment. The pearl inside was smashed and ruined.

As a child, I always hated that story. I was upset that because even though the fish persevered and went through all of that trouble, it never got it's reward.

Now, as I run and carry Quain's limp body, I wonder if I'm any different from that fish. There wasn't any point in saving Quain. If they were really all telling the truth about what he did, I was putting myself in danger.

I only had so much time to wait till the smoke had cleared from the building, so I had two options: run or hide. Running would only take me so far, they would eventually catch up to me and corner me, especially since I was carrying a boy. No matter how hard I tried to just drop and abandon him, I just couldn't do it. It wasn't right.

"Do what you feel is right, Annie, and always damn the consequences," my father had told me this once. I try to recall when he told me that, I believe... I think it was before he died. I don't remember the situation in which he told me this, but his words stuck to my heart, especially now.

The second option I had was hiding. I could hide anywhere in the hydroelectricity building, but if my pursuers found me, I was dead. So I decided to pick hiding. Running gives me the "I will die" option, while hiding gives me the "I could die" option.

I decided to go underground. The pumps and pipes underground were huge, and could serve as a maze. They'd probably split up to find me, and I could fight them off one by one. The only problem was: I had no weapon.

I would slap my own forehead, but my hands were full from carrying Quain. I should've taken something with me! Even a small knife would suffice! I didn't have any food either. All I had were the clothes on my back and a possibly homicidal small boy. Great.

I could hear Finnick groaning right now. He's probably watching me on television right now, shaking his head at my stupidity.
Focus!

I rushed to the elevator that goes underground. I didn't have a choice, I would have to wait there, and hopefully not starve to death or get killed. I slammed the button and the elevator doors shut behind me. This elevator wasn't as fancy as the one at the Tribute's building in the Capitol, so it wasn't exactly playing cheerful music. The dull drone of the mechanical makeshift scared me to the bone, and the walls vibrated making my teeth buzz.

When it finally stopped and opened, I walked out. I hesitated and thought perhaps I could barricade the door in case they came after me... but it probably wouldn't work. Besides, there wasn't anything that could act as a barricade in this room anyway.

There were three tunnels. One lead straight ahead, to a giant room that had to to be a hundred times the size of a gymnasium. It had the pumps. I could hear water churning in that area. Then there was a tunnel that lead to the left and the right. Both the left and right tunnels lead into the unknown, decorated with pipes. They say if you get stuck in a maze, always take left turns to find you're way back. So naturally, I turned left. I kept walking until fatigue wore me down.

I collapsed on the floor with Quain on my lap. I was so tired... I just prayed that Manter and the others wouldn't find me. I had to admit, that whole teaming situation was weird. When did Manter, Jake and Katie, and Sparks and Metallia form an alliance? And why was Manter so enraged at the fact that Tyler had died? What possible bond could they have formed in such a short week? I had a feeling there was more going on between those two... something bigger that I didn't know about.

Tyler. My stomach churned when I even thought of that name. They were right... his death was my fault. Why was my life anymore important than his? Should I even continue running? The Games will end quicker for me if I just...

"It's not your fault," a voice said. I nearly jumped. Quain was stirring and crawled off my lap. I still had no weapons, so I could be stuck in a tunnel with a homicidal child. However, he looked too weak to even hurt a fly.

"Tyler's death... it wasn't your fault," Quain got off me and rested both hands on the lump where Manter hit him.

"I was the one that strapped a bomb on him, so... you shouldn't really feel guilty about what you did back in the library. I saw what you tried to do back there... you tried to save his life."

"So it was you? You- You were the one that killed Tyler?" I asked.
"Yeah."
"Why?"
He sighed, "Tyler was going to die from blood loss in his legs anyway. Sparks and Metallia were the ones to throw knives into his legs. Your idea sparked my own idea. To kill two birds with one stone. Distract Jake and Katie's team and eliminate them."

"B-But how?" I stammered. "You're only twelve! How were you able to... how did you have the heart to..."

"I guess I've seen far worse and done worse than you, Annie," he answered.
He didn't say this coldly, he said it in a way that made me feel sorry for him. I've heard Katie's side of the story, but what was Quain's?

I got the nerve to ask him, "Quain, what was growing up in District Seven like?"

He hesitated, but then began to tell his story. He told me how he and his mother always cooked the dinner together, how he always went to work with his father, even though the labor was back-breaking. How his baby sister always got the biggest portion of the meal, which wasn't much, but Quain didn't mind.
Quain began rushing into the story, like he couldn't stop himself and needed to tell someone.

He told me how his mother knew Katie's family well, and was generous to loan money to them. How she didn't stop giving them money they were greedy for, until she didn't have any left. How they needed to find a new home. How Katie's family stole the only home they could have. How Quain's mom grew ill from overworking herself, to get money, despite her family's protests.

I heard the muffled sound of the Capitol anthem playing above ground, but I wouldn't be able to see who had died. I was too immersed in Quain's story, anyway.

He was on the verge of tears now, "And she worked, and worked, and worked! But it wasn't enough for her until she- she-," he clamped a hand on his mouth as if trying to stop himself from crying, or vomiting, or both.

The sobs began to rack his body. He sounded as if he never had the chance to tell anyone this ever. I never realized how alone he really was.

"And Katie?" I asked gently.
"It's her fault... she didn't even bother coming to the funeral. They just... they just used my mom," he said angrily.

I didn't bother arguing with him. Probably the right thing to say was, "Vengeance will get you nowhere! You have to be the better man!" However, I had a feeling he would not want to hear that.

We agreed to take watch. He would take first watch while I got some rest. I wasn't afraid he would kill me in my sleep, because he didn't exactly have a weapon on him. I was about to fall asleep when I heard him ask a question.

"Why did you try saving me?" he asked me.

I hesitated, "There's a question I suppose we both need answered. Goodnight."

I turned on my back and slept against the cold, dirty ground.