hate you but love you ( Dekubaku )

he doesn't hate me ...?

POV Bakugou

I run away from kirishima .

* A few minutes later*

Mr aizawa call us all for training and here I am again awkward between kirishima and Deku . I look at Deku and notice his eyes are puffy . Has he really been crying ? For what exactly ? He hates me so he definitely won't cry about me dating kirishima ... Don't tell me he likes kirishima !!? No way ! Well even if he does it's no use . Kirishima loves kaminari and I don't think Deku will go to far to get his hands on kirishima after what he did to me. But .. damn it..why do I suddenly feel so jealous about only guessing that Deku like kirishima . Of course I'll never date Deku so it doesn't matter who he likes . I snap outta my thoughts as Mr aizawa gives us instructions .

* Few hours later *

Our training is over for today. It's only 7 pm and I'm sleepy af but I don't wanna go back to others especially not when kirishima is waiting to question me and Deku will be sleeping beside me again so I'm standing in the mountain and smoking my last cig*rette. Damn I should have bought more . This training camp is so stressful.

" What the hell Bakugou ?! You're sm0king ? You're underage!"

I flinch at the sudden question and trun around . It's kirishima . When did he got here .

" What are you my teacher ? Just leave me alone "

" What was that ?! I'm not your teacher I'm your friend Bakugou . " He walks to me and takes the cigarette from me

" Hey give it back !" He throws it away

" You can't sm0ke "

" Just what's wrong with you ? Mind your own business shitty hair !"

" I was minding my own business till you suddenly kissed Infront of Midoriya . Then expect me to forget about it and left Midoriya crying in there . Now tell me what's going on with you ?"

" What you're mad about the little kiss which meant nothing ? You wanna break the friendship ? Ok then do it ,!" I slowly start to tear up

" I don't wanna end our friendship Bakugou ! I'm not here for that ! I'm here cause I'm worried about you .." he walks to me .
" I know something has been bothering you and it's definitely related to Midoriya. Now tell me what it is " I tear up remembering what Deku did to me ...

My tears fall " no ... there's nothing like that " he suddenly hugs me

" I'm your friend Bakugou ... You can tell me anything ... " He looks shoked after seeing me cry .

But no matter what I can't tell him everything that Deku did to me . How he mercilessly r*ped me and pushed me to d3ath . I ended everything with Deku I don't wanna drag it out. I have to make up something that makes kirishima believe why I kissed him and why Deku cried .

"Actually I ...I kissed you so Deku would back off ... I found out that Deku likes you and I already knew that you love kaminari ... that's why I made that up so Deku would back off ... I guess I over did it by kissing you ..he was heartbroken " I half lied to kirishima . I'm sure Deku likes him but I didn't kiss kirishima to make Deku back off I did it to prove him wrong about him saying that I'm hated by everyone. At least now he knows I have a lover . Even though... hurting him felt so terrible

I break the hug with Kirishima . " Now you know why I did that ...."

" Bakugou " he cups my cheeks " I know your intentions weren't bad but doing that wasn't a good idea . ... Now he thinks we're dating but I love kaminari what will happen when he knows kaminari and I are dating . I'm planning to ask him out "

" I don't know idiot . You can say we broke up or something it's not that hard "

He frowns " I guess that's the only option now . Ok I'll do that . Thanks for telling the truth Bakugou now let's go to the camp . It's getting cold in here "

" Ok ..." I walk towards the camp .

We trained for another week . Kirishima told Deku that him and I broke up cause he actually loves kaminari . Deku seemed pretty happy after knowing that. Does that mean he wasn't into kirishima !? He likes me !? That can't be true ... I'm overthinking .
I shouldn't care what he does .

We went back home after the training camp was over .

And now the normal school days start again .

I get ready for school and take the train . I'm standing there cause I didn't get a seat . Everything was ok till I notice deku in there siting . He stands up and walks to me . " Kacchan I'm sorry to hear about your breakup. You look a bit tired so sit on my seat
"

" Get outta my face Deku . It's so obvious you're happy about my breakup. What you're gonna tell me that no one will love me and everyone will leave me again ? I know that already and I don't need your pathetic seat go sit you as$ in there " I trun around without looking at his reaction . Just why the hell he's tryna act nice to me it's so annoying

" No one hates you kacchan ... " He says as he walks to his seat and sits back down

What was that about ? I don't care if anyone hate me or not anymore . Nothing matters . But ..Deku said no one hates me ...that means he don't hate me anymore .. damn why do I feel so happy about it I don't love him not anymore ...not after what he did to me ...

Suddenly a crowd of like 20 people get in the train but there's no seat here . These people don't always go by the train everyday as much as I know no one gets up the train in this stop .

But I don't care I just can't see Deku cause of the crowd anymore . Well it doesn't matter I can see him at school .

But ...what is this ... My head suddenly feels dizzy ... My heart is feeling numb .. what's happening ... I ..feel like I'm gonna faint ... My knees are giving in ..

TBC