Tea Parties in Boston

50 - Supportive compliments

Chapter 50

November 5th, 2016

Getting ready in her childhood bedroom Rory buttoned up the cute little cardigan that covered her flowery wrap dress. She felt relief that most of her clothes still covered her tiny baby bump, that was only visible to herself and now her mother to whom she'd told this very morning that she was pregnant.

She'd only slept 3-4 hours that morning, but it was not the tiredness she was focused on. She felt the town was closing up on her, as were the yellow walls of her bedroom. She didn't know a lot, but she knew she needed to find a way out of there.

She continued to go through the motions of getting ready, putting on some nice earrings, picking out a purse and shoes, feeling relieved she actually owned a bunch of nice clothes already so she didn't need to buy anything new for this event. Even though this probably would've been THE event to buy things for. In the midst of everything she had going on, it was even difficult to fully celebrate the wedding - it was so natural, so overdue, so logical - and after last night it really just felt like a formality.

Rory couldn't quite figure out why she was frustrated right this minute - sure, so many things were changing - her life was changing forever. There were people who had questions and expected answers, there were people she needed to contact, there were things to figure out - a job to get, figure out her living situation that didn't involve this particular bedroom. It felt almost as suffocating as her mother's bedroom must've felt to her at 16, but right at this minute it made no difference that her relationship with her mother was so much more genuine than her mother had had with grandma.

But she knew, the minute Lorelai and Luke were on their honeymoon, she would have a moment to figure things out. It was just what she needed. But right at this minute - what hurt her was the Yale memorabilia scattered around the walls and mirrors of this room. It might've been the hormones, but who knew...

It had always been about getting into a good prep school, then into a good college. It had been about doing well in everything she could, doing volunteer work, doing internships, working jobs that paid nearly nothing - or working on spec, grabbing at opportunities, making and keeping contacts, keeping herself in the picture. And despite everything she was still there. Now it just felt like those Yale pennants and posters were laughing at her. Like they could smell her and her pregnancy.

"I smell, don't I?" Rory mumbled to herself, and unceremoniously sniffed her armpit, having an odd, heightened sense of smell these past week and she wasn't quite sure whether she should apply more deodorant or whether it was just her nose playing tricks on her.

But instead of reaching for the antiperspirant or one of her perfume bottles that had stood on her dresser for far too long, she ripped down the Yale pennant that was staring back at her and headed to the back of her room to remove anything else that referred to Yale in any way, leaving just the photos from her travels. There was certainly more that she owned, clothing items included, but those would just have to wait. At least for one night she could just blame it on her choosing Yale instead of Harvard, despite knowing it was a feeble attempt to excuse anything.

"God, how I could use a drink," Rory muttered quietly, and tossed the items into an empty box to dispose of later. The trouble was, she would be spending a lot more time that day pretending to drink than actually drinking.

"Hello?" Rory could suddenly hear a familiar deep voice, following a brief knock, from the foyer. Rory shoved the box under her bed, not wanting to explain. "You ready? Your mom told me to pick you up, they're almost done with the pictures," Jess added as Rory appeared in the kitchen.

"Yeah, I'm ready... but you really didn't need it. I could've walked," Rory said, not feeling too much like making small-talk right now. It was good to see Jess, it had been especially good to share with him that she had three solid chapters written, but what more came from it was still very much in limbo. Most of her best writing she'd done before she'd figured out she was expecting, now... it put a whole other spin on how she saw things.