TBATE - Fated To Rule Together

Chapter 2 - Reminiscing A Blissful Pain

(Amber Helstea POV) 

I remembered the day I was reborn in this world. My earliest recollection is that of a brilliant white light that took me off guard. For a brief minute, I believed I had died and was about to be met by a choir of angels dressed in pristine white and gold robes as I rode by them in a carriage drawn by two Pegasi. They would be singing a soothing, melodious symphony, restoring my peace and comforting my shattered heart after such struggle and sorrow. 

Going from being a powerful queen that ruled over nations and had everything I ever wanted, to being a miserable widow who was too weak to even get out of bed, I had welcomed death with open arms. For me, it was a friend who had come to help me end all the pain and suffering. It was my saviour, taking me back to where I belonged; to whom I belonged to! 

I remember when I was given birth to, the first thing I did was cry. To the others listening, all that came out of my mouth was the wails of a newly born infant, making sure people heard of its arrival. In actuality, it was totally different. When I realised that I was being reincarnated, I couldn't help but cry out in sorrow, misery and anguish. I couldn't live a life without him! Not again! Once was unbearable! My second life would be even more meaningless! 

I watched the world around me with empty eyes, not being able to do anything. I was an infant and had no motor control. Thus, I just lay there on my baby bed reminiscing good times, which always led me to end up crying again. When others would play with me in the hopes of eliciting an infantile chuckle or any kind of reaction, their efforts were futile. All they saw in them were two dead eyes, devoid of excitement and life. 

When Tabitha, the person whom I now call Mother, saw this, she tried everything she could to try and change me. She must have thought that my biological mother dying beside me must have affected me greatly in some sort of way, and so, she tried everything. From showering me with all her motherly love, to buying me toys to play with, and even taking me to the doctors in this world, yet nothing worked. I thought she would eventually give up with me like everyone else, yet I was unexpectedly proven wrong. 

She kept trying to cheer me up, day in and day out. This went on for weeks and months, and I was left amazed by her commitment. Little by little, my interest and respect in her grew until I soon warmed up to her and the Helsteas, savouring what little joy I could find. Even though I knew my life would never be complete without him, slowly but steadily, I began to live again and tried to embrace everything this world had to offer. Despite this, I made sure one thing remained constant. It was my recollections of him. Even while I was producing new memories, I took time to reflect on the ones I treasured the most. 

It was tough at first, trying not to cry every time I remembered those moments of bliss, but they eventually became memories I could look back on to cheer myself up. That is, until today! My heart began to swell with hope the instant I saw him, and my reasonable thinking was hindered. When that hope faded, a sense of sadness and sorrow took its place, trying to fill the void left behind! 

(AN: Song fits perfect with the context.)

"Grey...," I whispered through my cries. 

Memories of our time together flooded back like a massive wave of loss and sadness. The vibrant, lush, flowery meadows and cherry blossom trees I used to take him to in our spare time, where we would play hide and seek like a pair of kids having fun. I remembered how my heart skipped a beat every time I met eyes with his and believed he'd found me, both out of playful tension and undeniable love. I remembered how I always looked forward to the time when he would find me and wrap his arms around my waist from behind. His reassuringly muscular arms. I still can't fathom how gentle yet powerful they felt. He would carry me in a bridal style and spin me around whilst the flowers and cherry blossoms danced around and serenaded us. The kind of scene every teenage girl romanticises about. But that was no fairy tale, it had been real for me so many years ago.