Double Loss

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*This chapter contains trigger warnings for child loss*


I woke up back in the lab, connected to machines and IVs, and alone. I sat up, trying to find a way to let someone know I was awake. The door opened, slowly and I saw Eddie, trying to be quiet. He carried a large bouquet of purple roses, my favorite. He saw I was awake and put the roses down and sat next to me on the bed, wrapping his arms around me.

“Eddie, I know what happened.” I said, bursting into tears and burying my face in his neck. I felt his body shake with his sobs and I knew I was right.

I lost the baby. 

“I’m so sorry Eddie, i'm so fucking sorry.”

“Stop that right now” he said, pulling back to look in my eyes “ it’s not your fault. Not one bit of this was your fault, do you hear me?” He said, wiping tears from my face.

“I can’t believe that Eddie. I had to have done something wrong. It was fine and healthy this afternoon.” He looked at me, almost shocked.

“This afternoon? Dove, you’ve been out for almost 3 days.”

“Wait, what? 3 days? What the hell?”

“Yea. and I know it’s not your fault, because it’s mine.” Before I could ask him what he meant, Owens came in.

“Hey y/n, welcome back. How do you feel?” 

“I swear if someone asks me that again I'll snap. I'm sorry, just tell me what happened.”

“Well, it seems that, well it wasn’t compatible with life.”

“Bullshit Doc, tell her the truth.” Eddie said from beside me.

“Ok, ok. From what we can tell, your human blood and Eddie’s not human blood didn’t mix as well as we originally thought. It looked almost like Eddie’s blood destroyed yours, and in effect caused you to miscarry. I’m so very sorry y/n.” Owens said, looking like it was his fault that he didn’t catch it sooner.

“See, I told you it’s my fault.” Eddie said, getting angry.

“Eddie, stop.” I said, taking his hand in mine, but he pulled away harshly.

“No y/n, can’t you see or are you too damn stupid? I’m fucking toxic! My blood killed our baby. Mine, not yours! Jesus, I can’t do this.” he yelled out, walking out the door, slamming it behind him. I couldn’t do anything but sob loudly. What the hell was happening right now? 

“Your dad’s in the waiting room, I'll just go get him.” 

“Owens, wait. Something is wrong with Eddie. He never gets angry like that, never. Please figure out what’s happening to him.” I begged. He nodded at me and walked out, Hopper walking in shortly after.  He didn’t say anything, just held me until I stopped crying, which seemed like it would never stop.

Eddie didn’t come back to the hospital for the next 2 days I was there and he wasn’t home when I got there, so I asked if I could stay with Hop and joyce. I couldn’t stand to be alone, and they welcomed me. Finally seeing my sweet Ivy after almost a week was the only good thing. She attached herself to me almost instantly, only letting me go when she slept.

Asking for her daddy broke my heart. I had nothing to tell her. No one knew where he was, and if they did they weren’t telling me. I took the next 2 weeks off from work to recover, telling no one what actually happened. Thanks to Owens, my doctor's note said I sprained my foot and had to stay off of it for 2 weeks. I stayed with Hop and Joyce for that time, finally relenting and going home the weekend before I was to start working again.

As expected, the house was empty. What I didn't expect ws for all of Eddie’s things to be gone. Anything that proved he was ever there was gone, except for the note.

Dove, 

I'm sorry. I can’t do this anymore. No matter what I do, I end up hurting you and while that's horrible enough, I can't risk hurting Ivy.

I love you and always will, but you’re safer without me and we both know that.

I'm sorry, I love you both so much and this is killing me but I have to do it.

Always, E

“Really Eddie?! Now you decide running away is a good idea? You promised me you weren’t gonna leave me again! You fucking promised! Fuck you Eddie Munson, you fucking coward! If you were just gonna leave again, you should have never come back!” I screamed out, hoping he was close enough to hear me. I was glad I decided to let Ivy stay with Hop and Joyce one more night, because I was in no condition to be a mother right now.

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