A Lifetime Ago

Chapter 11.5

AN- So originally I just wrote this chapter as a way to process and let out how I felt about an event that happened around the time while I was writing the last chapter. There was a lockdown at my school because they thought someone had a weapon - don't worry no one got hurt and it was just a big misunderstanding! But it was really freaky during the events and I had seen the police pull up right before and it felt like in the movies when they see something happening but don't realize it until later. But to process I wrote about it using my comfort characters - Silrah 🥰 - I wasn't going to share at first but then thought I might. THIS IS NOT PART OF THE ACTUAL STORY LINE! Feel free to skip if you don't feel like reading or feel like it might trigger you. P.S. Imma just copy and paste the first lil bit (maybe edit a lil), hope adding this won't be too confusing. P.S.S. Yes I know this might be a bit unrealistic to have a lockdown at Alfea when they can just fight and use magic, also sorry for the long intro note.

I wasn't sure if I was going to post it or not but I thought someone might be interested in reading it.

(17 years old - Second year, second day of school)

When we made it to my suite the common area was empty, everyone had retreated back to their rooms before classes. I opened the door to the room I share with Rose and followed him in. Rose wasn't there so I wasn't quite sure where she'd gone. We sat down on my bed, I sat in between his outstretched legs, my back leaning against him. His arms were wrapped tight around me, his head buried in my neck. I rested my head against his and closed my eyes resting for a while. We stayed like this for at least an hour I'd say until he finally decided to speak up.

"Fay," He said gently, his voice barely a whisper as he stroked my hair.

I opened my eyes acknowledging his words so he knew I was awake and snuggled deeper into his embrace.

"We need to talk" His voice was still soft, his lips gently as he gave my neck a small kiss and then another kiss on my cheek.

"Or..." I started, shifting in his embrace so I could face him "We could not" I suggested, really not wanting to converse over the subject I knew he was trying to bring up. I rested my hands on the hem of his shirt and leaned in for a kiss. At first he obliged yet when I tried to deepen the kiss he pushed me back slightly just enough that our lips couldn't meet. Slightly frustrated that my plan to distract him hadn't succeeded, I sat back on my heels.

He sighed "Farah, what happened last year is serious." His voice was firm yet caring.

"You weren't there last year." I snapped at him harshly and instantly regretted it, nonetheless I kept the same tone of voice. "You. Weren't. There. So you don't get to lecture or feel sorry for me. I'm better. I'm getting better." I corrected myself quickly. A guilty, almost sad puppy dog look appeared on his face yet the rage within me wouldn't dissipate. But he seemed to have given up.

"Look, Farah, we don't have to talk about it right now. But I want you to know I'm always here for you. Whether that's a shoulder to cry on or someone to talk to." He grabbed my hand and gave it a small squeeze and the tension that had been building up within me slowly started to drain. I laid back down in his embrace without saying another word and just laid there taking everything in. After a minute I got up and walked over to the window. I didn't bother to sit on the bench in front of it. I just stood there, staring out the window. I heard him shifting but never heard footsteps so I assumed he'd just sat up. I saw a crowd of people in black coming towards the school and found it odd but thought nothing of it as I turned and walked towards my bed where Saul now sat. I stopped in front of him and sighed,

"I'm sorry. You were just trying to help."

"Farah, I know you better than myself. I shouldn't have pushed-" But he was cut off by the sound of Rosalind's voice echoing through the suite.

"Lockdown." One word was all it took for the panic to arise in the suite. I could hear the other girls running around unsure what to do. I felt the same.

Saul took control of the situation, his calm and in control aura radiating throughout the room. He strolled over to the light switch by the door and flicked them off. "Put something over the window." He added quickly before heading out the door into the common area, probably to help the others.

I pulled the drapes over the windows and as I headed to the common room to see what everyone was doing I kept replaying the scene I'd seen outside right before Rosalind's words had sent us to panic. Everyone was surprisingly calm, yet a bit disorganized going back and forth from one side of the room to the other trying to turn everything off and barricade the door. I bang came from the floor below and that's when everyone froze. I cursed Rosalind for the runic limiters. If there was a fight I'd be useless and just dragging everyone down. Everyone was brought back to reality when the main lights flicked off. The only light remaining was the fairy lights in the corner that Bronte quickly turned off. We all gathered in the kitchen sitting on the cold tiled floor. I didn't realize how stressed I was at first. I hadn't even noticed that I was clenching onto Bronte's sleeve until she gave my hand a reassuring squeeze. She was so calm and collected that I wondered if it was just a brave face on the edge of danger or if she genuinely wasn't worried. I squeezed my eyes shut and rested my head against my knees trying to block out the outside world and think about anything but what was happening at this exact moment. I felt Saul's hand grasp my own and felt bad as I adjusted his hand into my death grip. I was grateful he was here with me. I felt like he knew me better than I knew myself. He knew I was probably in my own head stressing about all the ways this could turn ugly - which I was.

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AN- So that's where I ended this cause I felt better and didn't want to relive it too much and also i didn't know where to elaborate from there so ya!