Because of My Past (Jikook AU)

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C H A P T E R   8 ⤂

... Jungkook 10 years old ...

Jungkook liked to draw. It wasn't like he had the right supplies but that never took the fun out of it. He drew a number of things but the one consistent thing that he'd always doodled was this woman.

Jungkook had thought that maybe it was someone that his mind had created. someone who could save him from his shitty life.

At a time when he still cared for school, Jungkook was in his room doodling that lady again instead of doing his homework when his father barged into his room. On instinct, Jungkook tried to hide his drawing but it was too late, his father saw.
"What are you doing?"

"Um, nothing...  just homew-"

Before Jungkook could finish his excuse, his dad snatched the drawing out of his hand and Jungkook would never forget the look on his father's face that day. It was the only time Jungkook had ever seen him look... human. Emotion filled his eyes and he was tearing up but he immediately schooled his expression.

"Where did you find this?" Jungkook's father said through clenched teeth 

Unsure of what to expect from his dad, Jungkook remained quiet.
"WHERE DID YOU GET THIS!" his father repeated with a rage-filled voice

"I- I drew it," Jungkook replied. His voice came out barely as a whisper but his dad heard him. He wasn't satisfied with jungkook's answer

"You fucking liar! You went into my room huh!? HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO GO IN THERE!"

Jungkook sat there on his bed as tears silently fell from his eyes "I didn't go"

"Then explain how the fuck you'd know what she looked like?!"

"HOW THE HELL WOULD YOU KNOW?" This scream was different from the rest.

This scream was laced both with venom and anguish. Though, it didn't bring any comfort to Jungkook.

"You're the one who took her away so you have no right to keep any memory of her! If you wanted her here you wouldn't have taken her life."

"I didn't know" Jungkook cried  "I'm sorry I won't draw her anymore"

"You sure as hell won't" His father ripped the drawing in his hand into pieces and then began to ransack Jungkook's room for any other drawings he had.

Jungkook didn't understand, it was just a drawing! But then again he didn't yet understand the emotions that one drawing, photo, or even just an object could bring.

Jungkook tried to stop his dad but a slap resounded around the room. Jungkook's ears were ringing.

Did my dad just hit me?

He knew his dad didn't want him but he'd believed that his father was still just grieving. That he'd get better when Jungkook grew a little more, but that slap acted as a wake-up call. He was never going to change no matter how much Jungkook hoped or wished.

That day Jungkook understood that his dad had no fatherly instincts, he'd never let go of his mother and he'd never love his son because all Jungkook was to him was a burden.

A murderer.

That day was the first time his dad had ever hit him and the last day jungkook would ever draw anyone.

He doesn't do portraits...