• 𝐃𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐌𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐲 •

• 16 •

valerie

The next morning, I woke up and Eneaj was gone from my side. I sat up quickly, and threw the covers off of me. I grabbed my pants off the nightstand besides me and pulled them on. I checked the bathroom, then I headed downstairs.

Milli seemed like the only one awake, chilling on the couch, scrolling through her phone.

"Anybody else up?" I asked, plopping down a few spots away from her.

"Nahhhh," she said slowly, emerged in whatever she was watching.

"Milli...don't think I hate y'all or anything."

"Nobody ever said that, Valerie."

"Emilia," I sighed.

"Valerie."

"Emilia," I repeated.

"Val-

"Why Jadyn?" I asked, because I really wanted to know. "I built this shit up from the ground. We were supposed to all grow old together and get rich and not have to do this shit anymore. I guess I'm just stuck on all of this because it feels like y'all are tryna steal my dream away from me."

"Would you rather do it all on your own?" she asked, looking up and finally taking her attention away from her phone. "Because the three of us can go about life and hit our own licks," she shrugged, "I'm just sayin'."

"I'd...rather things be how it used to be," I told her softly. "I feel like I'm really losin' y'all."

"You didn't have your shit together. Done deal," she rubbed the bridge of her nose, looking annoyed, "So can we please stop talking about this and all do what we agreed to in the car last night- remain peaceful?"

"Yeah," I got up from the couch, "We can do that."

"You're not comin' back with us to the hotel are you?"

"No...I'm not," I told her, realizing that I meant it.

Milli looked like she wanted to say more but she didn't. "Alright, Val. If that's what you want."

I looked away from her and almost ran into Pey with two bowls and a tube of ice cream that she was taking back to the kitchen.

"Yo wassup?" I nodded at Pey.

"You might wanna go check on Eneaj. I was comforting her and Yenvy this mornin'. Something bad happened to someone they knew."

I jogged up the stairs, eventually finding Yenvy's door. I timidly knocked on the door, entering before I got an invitation. The room was a bit messy, most of Pey's things around the room. I guess my theory of them hunching or some shit last night was true.

Eneaj and Yenvy were cuddled up in the bed, heads against one another's, dried and running tears on their puffy faces.

"What happened, girls?" I asked softly.

"Our friend Illiora," Yenvy sighed, covering her wet eyes, "she died."

"When?" I sat on the edge of the bed, reaching my hand out for Eneaj to tenderly grab.

"This morning. A day before her flight outta Texas. She had some serious shit goin' on and," Yenvy held back a sob.

"She was really tryna do the right thing, for real," Eneaj sighed. "Man...that girl worked for me. We went to school together, mane."

"I'm sorry to hear that," I told them softly.

"More refreshments," Pey came back into the room, sitting a tray of some breakfast snacks down on the nightstand next to Pey.

"When I woke up and didn't see you, I thought you had left or something. Didn't know you were in here. I woulda came sooner," I apologized to Eneaj.

"You're fine," she waved off my apology, "Man. I know her mom's torn up. They were close. Like me and mine's. I mean shit, we den met each other's parents before. We was that tight. All three of us. I mean, it wore off a bit after high school, but damn...I was just talkin' to shawty the other day. It can't be," Eneaj grabbed a tissue out of the box sitting sideways at her feet, blowing into it.

"Is it anything I can do for you, mama?" I leaned on my right side, grabbing her hand again and scooting up closer after she was done with the tissue. "I'm here."

"I was supposed to help her, Pey," Yenvy dabbed at her eyes, "I feel like I failed her," her voice broke.

"Nahh, nahh. Some things just be outta our control, for real. Let it go, shawty. Let it go," Pey rubbed her back slowly.

"I think I'm just gonna take a nap," Yenvy murmured, scooting down under the covers and laying down. Eneaj rubbed at her best friend's shoulder. Me and Peytyn watched them comfort each other.

"Let's give them some space," she whispered to me, and I gave Eneaj a lonely wave, following Pey out of the room.

"A nap ain't gon fix that sadness. That type of feeling comes back over and over again. The difference is that once you're healed...it happens less," I said, shoving my hands into my pockets.

"But a nap will help for right now. That's what she needs," Pey agreed.

"I'm not comin' back with you guys, Pey," I told her, looking down at her as we walked to the living room.

"I figured as much. You and Jadyn already would bump heads too much before," she attempted at a laugh.

"Yeah," I shrugged hopelessly.

"Where are you gonna stay? Here?"

"I don't know. I'll make my own way. Find my own way to thrive...again," I glanced over at her.

Pey blinked quickly, seeming to be wrapping her head around things. "So like that, Val?"

"Yeah. Like that," I scoffed, then I let go of my attitude. "I think I just need to be alone. For a very long time. No bad blood wit any of y'all though. I promise that."

"Not even Jadyn?" she asked curiously. "Not even...me, for taking her side with things?"

"Nope."

"I just know that you've been through a lot, and yo-

"I wasn't mature enough to be apart of what we were doing. I see that now, Pey. You don't gotta explain nothing," I threw my arm around her shoulder. "I'm only gonna do shit that makes me proud of myself from now on."

"I really wish I could cuff Yenvy but I know Jadyn wouldn't allow it," she sighed heavily. "That girl is a diamond, bruh. She's amazing."

"Coming from someone who used to hit ten to twelve shawty's in a span of three weeks, I think that's maturity I'm hearin' from you, Peytyn," I grinned. "Are you gonna let another grown woman dictate your life for the rest of your days? For the sake of gettin' money effectively."

"Hollup now. You not finna make me go rogue like you," Pey held up her hands. "But I get what you mean."

"Maybe it's time I find a real job. A real sense of meaning. Because money ain't everything. Money ain't worth losing...shit like this," I gestured between us two. "Yet...the world we live in, that's what we gotta do. Especially people like us, man."

"I say you and Jadyn talk again."

"Not likely, sis. Not likely," I gave her a side hug and nodded towards the front door. "Ima step outside for a minute."

"Ight," Pey said.

"Ight."