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valerie

I laid in the hospital bed, staring up at the ceiling.

"...in this room here. I'll ask her if she wants any visitors."

"You can ask her but I'm comin' in anyways."

"Let her in, please," I called out.

"There's, uh, two people," the nurse poked her head in. Eneaj came in around the nurse, Jadyn walking in a moment later.

"That's fine," I gave the nurse a tired smile.

"What the fuck, Val?" Eneaj immediately said. She came to my bedside and squeezed the fuck out of me. "I was so scared. I thought I was gonna lose you."

"Well you didn't," I said, my voice numb as I held her. "You're hurtin' me, mama." She pulled back, holding my hand, "What happened, Val?" My eyes started to tear up, and that would have been half okay if I had just been in front of my girlfriend, but then Jadyn was here too.

"I lost control...again."

I felt defeated inside. Like I was fighting a battle against things that couldn't be killed...and I was an army of one, taking all the hits.

"I'm sorry for being such a weak girlfriend, Eneaj. I know none of this is what you signed up for," i hiccuped.

"Val, no," Eneaj said softly.

And there it was. Now I was crying.

Jadyn came around the other side, awkwardly rubbing my back as I cried on Eneaj's shoulder. I felt like such a pussy, but it also felt good to let all of this out oddly.

"You can't hold your trauma in, Val. It'll eat up at you. That's what happened...here, right?"

"I got stressed and it's like I unlearned everything I told myself I was going to stop doing," I admitted. Just like that, the tears were gone. I wanted to cry more, but that was my yearly crying limit in front of other people now. I was well past it.

"But why didn't you tell me?" Eneaj frowned.

"You were dealin' with enough. So I smiled and tried to be perfect. I definitely see the appeal in drinks that Yenvy does-

"Don't say that," Jadyn frowned. "You don't wanna fall down that hole either."

"I think that's why I was so fucked up last night. I was tryna drown my feelings...and I ended up drowning out everything that I am with them," I admitted too.

"Are you okay now? What did the doctor say?" she asked.

"They're gonna get me right. Get my BMI up and allat. Then I'll be released. They, um, recommended an outpatient clinic but I declined," I added.

"If that's what you need, Valerie," Eneaj said softly, kissing me.

"Um," Jadyn awkwardly turned away.

"I don't want to. I got this on my own."

"You clearly don't. You need our support, and maybe something more," Jadyn stated.

"Jadyn...don't start."

"For years," Jadyn said to Eneaj, pointing at me, "I have been tellin' her to acquire some help for her problem. She doesn't wanna listen. And then this keeps happenin' again."

"I sat back watchin' Yenvy with her problem, I won't do that with you," Eneaj sniffled, swiping away at her eyes. "I won't, Val."

"I promise it won't happen again," I assured her, squeezing her hand.

"Damn, Val, you're not in trouble. Stop promisin' about stuff. It's likely to happen again but I want you to get real help instead of whatever you've been doin' alone."

I shook my head.

"Arguin' with her is a lost cause on this, Eneaj."

"You don't understand- I can't lose anymore people from my life, man. Val, just listen please."

"Eneaj," Jadyn came around the bed, tenderly touching her arm. Jadyn stared into her eyes for a moment, shaking her head. Eneaj looked down, as Jadyn's hand dropped off of her.

My jaw clenched...but I said nothing.

"I'll be let out in three day's max, that's what the nurse figured. You can go back to the club and supervise things there. I'll be fine," I stated.

Eneaj shook her head, still overwhelmed with emotion, it seemed. "I don't even wanna go back there no more, babe." She burst into tears and I looked up at Jadyn, "What happened? Is it cause of last night?"

"No...something else happened," Jadyn said. "A bunch of people came in and ransacked the club, and...held Eneaj at gunpoint."

"What?" I sat up.

"Baby, calm down," Eneaj tried to soothe me.

"I'm layin' up here and somebody came in and hurt my girlfriend, and you tell me this now?"

Jadyn came around to my side, closer now. "We don't know who it is, but one of the people Eneaj described was Zaza. The drug dealin' apartment manager-

"Yeah, I remember him, he had sumin to do with the whole Illiora thing we were-

I shut up. "They want us to stop lookin' into it."

"And we won't," Eneaj said firmly. "My friend will have justice."

"She said everyone else was covered up. That Zaza stated him and his goons were hired to do it to prove a point."

"But didn't say by who?" I asked, my head pounding.

"No," Jadyn sighed.

"What-Who got to Eneaj? Who saved her?"

"Jadyn," Eneaj said softly.

Jealously stirred inside of me, but I ignored it.

"Did you get injured?" I asked her.

"Zaza knocked me out," she said.

Jadyn peered down at me. "This is your call, Val."

"Thanks, after all this time," I rolled my eyes. "I want Milli to go to Zaza and..." I glanced at Eneaj sitting there, ever so innocently, "...make him pay. I want Pey over at Yenvy's, grilling her."

"Ha. That's gonna turn into an argument," Eneaj murmured.

"Well then send Milli to Yenvy's and Pey to Zaza's," I told Jadyn, switching it around.

"Me and you are gonna get down to the bottom of both of these mystery's once and for all. I have a feeling this whole Kaley deal and the Illiora deal are twisted up real bad."

"It has to be connected. That's what this is all pointing to," Jadyn stated. We both watched as Eneaj absentmindedly rubbed her head. "And they're not gonna use her as a point to be proven any more."

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