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She finds his eyes once more, completely oblivious to the pathetic feeling closing in and overwhelming him.
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The light sound of shuffling beside you woke you up at some ungodly hour, eyelashes soon fluttering open and your mind registering that the bed beside you was cold enough to know that Kyle has been up for a while. You tilt your head, confused on why he'd be awake right now.
Remembering the events that brought you two to be sleeping in the same bed as eachother- now in the right mind, makes your whole body hot with blush. It was impulsive, that's for sure. If the Captain happened to see his favourite sergeant and the new recruit in this position you were now in, he'd be very, very concerned. Or even worse, if Ghost and Soap saw, you two would never hear the end of it.
Either way, being able to cuddle with Gaz was hella worth it.
Having to squint your eyes to adjust to the darkness. He was sitting up, his back facing your way, elbows resting on his knees with his palms were covering his eyes.
You could see his desolate silhouette -barely able to make out the bulk of his body in the dark as he hunches over the side of the bed. But you caught yourself staring into his strong, chiseled, and scarred back, before averting your eyes, choosing to focus instead on his breaths; which were repeatedly short and shallow - hyperventilating like. You were able to see the turmoil behind his body language.
You blinked, hoping to maintain some sliver of drowsiness before shifting your way out of the cocoon of the blankets you found yourself lost in.
Sliding yourself out of bed so you're next to the man, you turn yourself to face him. He hadn't noticed you're awake, too absorbed in the bubble he had made for himself.
"Something wrong?" Your concern pierced voice brought him back to this realm.
His head jolts out of his hands, eyes that held the same exhaustion as before slightly widened with suprise before changing into something more guilty.
Your voice registered in his ears but he didn't listen, he ignores your question, instead asking one of his own."Did I wake you?"
You shot him a sheepish smile, giving him an honest answer.
You would have bet on your life that you saw him choke up, but you would never out him. "Fuck. I'm sorry."
You gave him a kind shake of your head, he didn't need to apologise.
Kyle looked like something had weighed on him more than he would have liked to admit, almost sad.
His expression was pained, lips quirked with a slight downturn and eyes solely narrowed on your form. His eyebrows were pressed in on his forehead; curing in the center and creating small creases over his face.
You could already fit the pieces together on what happened.
Well, you don't make special forces without missing a few important parts of your brain. Adrenaline-junkies, masochists, power complexes; And with it- comes the dreaded effects of just doing your job; depression, anxiety, night terrors, trauma,- the whole package deal.
