Olifina: Love And Trouble

35. Reconciliation

"You want to tell me something?" I finally asked after some awkward seconds of sitting in silence.

I could see the hesitation in her. "I'm sorry, Rufina."

I had expected her to come with an apology but I was still surprised.

"I won't say my actions weren't intentional. I'm owning up to them and I regret them. They have only brought me bad luck and drawn me away from my family."

I did not know what to say in response.

"Please forgive me. I'll try my best to make up for the years I stayed away. I didn't mean those things I said to you. My judgment was clouded by sadness and grief. I allowed it to override me."

"But you meant it."

My voice came out steely and cold. Mum's shock was evident in her expression.

"Meant what?"

"I caused Dad's death."

She was taken aback for a second there. "I meant it then and to be honest, I have thought about my words and I still believe that if you had jumped earlier, Geronimo would have still been alive."

I looked away from her. Honestly, I wasn't surprised.

"But I'm not blaming you. You are just as affected by the problem as we all are. If there's anyone to blame, it's me. I brought you guys here in the first place."

I shook my head at her. "You were in trouble. You needed help. Anyone could've done what you did. We need to stop blaming ourselves for what that maniac did."

She nodded. "Rufina, all I want now more than anything is your forgiveness. Please forgive me."

I sighed and then looked her in the face for the first time since she approached me. "I forgive you. Besides, Dad would not have wanted us to remain like this."

"No," she replied, shaking her head. "No, he wouldn't have."

I could see a lot of pain and regret in her eyes. She was sorry. I was too. I had my share of accusations from her and so did she.

She held my hand and smiled. It was nice to make amends with her. It was like a huge weight had been lifted off my chest. After Oliver's outburst that morning I felt bad for how I had also treated her.

"I'll be going to bed now," I said, standing up.

I stopped at the entrance to the dining and turned back as I noticed she wasn't following me. "You're not going to bed?"

She shook her head. "No, I don't feel sleepy."

I nodded, then walked away to my room. As I laid on my bed that night I thought of what she had said. She was sorry and so was I. After so many years of being apart, it seemed we were finally coming back together as mother and daughter.

While I slept that night, it wasn't with a heavy heart. The next morning I woke up with an idea.

We needed to honour Dad in one way or the other. I had never been to the Day of the Dead festival but I wanted to attend. There, Mum and I could have a sort of memorial.

That morning Mum refused to Come down for breakfast. I had to meet her in her room to ask what the problem was.

"After what I did yesterday, I don't think Oliver would want to see me," Mum complained.

From the time I spent with Oliver, I did not see him as someone who would act the way Mum described. "No, if he hated you he would not have asked you to stay. He just wanted us to work things out."